Posts tagged tech
Happy Sunday, my crazy nasty*ss honey readers!
Nary a blog post all weekend from this lass, eh? My apologies (because I know you live and die by the regularity of my blog posts. What up, Obama family? Thanks for reading!) — it’s been a busy one though.
More on the lot of my adventures (plus some huge news) later, but first: Internet Memes 101 at Podcamp 2012, WHAAAAT?
This was my third year at Podcamp (year one, year two) and I’d been toying with the idea of presenting for a few weeks. So, at the very last minute I finagled my way into a spot and tossed together the only thing I felt passionate enough to spend both Thursday and Friday nights inside the Matrix working on:
To my delight though, the room was already filling up as I arrived to plug in. Too bad said room was in a basement with no freaking Internet connection.
The entire group marched up 3 flights of stairs through the Rogers Communications Centre with me. These people are obviously as dedicated to Internet hilarity as I am (and maybe you too, since you are reading this blog), which makes them fooking stars:
Ethernet! Great success! John Leschinski rules at LIFE!!!
The feedback I got from Twitter after the presentation was cool. Being told I’m funny feels better than anything else (save for being told I’m SUPER RICH, but that’s just an assumption. I’ve never been rich. I bet it feels great.)
@laurenonizzle best presentation of the day. Great LOLs
— Kim Champion (@VaughanEditor) February 25, 2012
— Russ Martin (@russless) February 25, 2012
— canada.com Tech (@canadacomTech) February 25, 2012
— Jonny Bunning (@emaninTdot) February 25, 2012
— Bernard Hellen (@bernardhellen) February 25, 2012
Thanks again to everyone who came out for real. You made this little blonde nerd’s week!
If you didn’t get a chance to see it live, here are the slides. Many won’t make sense or be as good without the verbal commentary / jokes behind them, but there are some funny videos and lots of weird crap so it’s still worthwhile I think.
I should have included blue waffle in things not to google (DON’T DO IT) and Badger Badger in classics. *sigh* There really are more memes out there on the World Wide Web than anyone could ever document in full… Except for KnowYourMeme. They do it. I don’t.
WAH, give me a break. I am but one cat and the Oscar red carpet show is about to begin. Want more information about Internet Memes? GOOGLE IT
Memes 101 w/ @laurenonizzle @ #PCTO12. Lots of hilarity Room 357
Feb 25, 2012 | Source: Keek.com
Alright, It’s time to get my judge on. You know, Tweet about how much I love everything that isn’t touching Goopy Paltrow or any of the other Hollywonks I can’t stand.
Fingers crossed Jean DuJardin has a wardrobe malfunction
Greetings, puny human!
A couple of weeks ago, I was asked to write a piece on consumer technology trends for the incomparably fabulous Yorkdale.
True to my nature, I jumped at the chance to spend some legit time obsessing over gadgets and gizmos. Tablets were tested, televisions were toyed with and the rest, as the say, is history. Quite literally once you click through to the article! Web browser history! Get it? Waka waka waka!
I had a blast and a half frolicking through the Mall’s finest electronic, gaming and communications stores, gathering intelligence for this post. The hardest part was paring down my list of things to feature since – as you may already know – I love me some gadget. All of them. ALL OF THE GADGETS.
Thanks for calling me a “Tech Expert”, guys That made me go “hehehe!”
In other “stuff I did that I want to show off on my blog” news, here’s that interview with Rob Dyer I promised!
I’ve also got the Power of Movement Yoga-thon, some Oscar stuff, and a Raptor’s game this weekend. Make that a Raptors EXPERIENCE courtesy of #RTZ – bomb seats, pre-game shoot around, meet and greet with players… you should totally come. I’ll wear my special hat
You know how they say that sleep is for the weak? I wish that were true. I’m incredibly weak and I never sleep. But I’m not complaining, no. Life is good, dear homies… just a few more months until the cold goes away and it gets Grrreat!
j/k. It was me.
Now my BB matches my iPod
Some things are just too perfect not to buy.
Maybe I can get a bodysuit with that print on it too…
I’m totally going to be that moms who dresses her kids in matching outfits when I grow up, aren’t I?
A long, busy day for this kid. Here are the highlights – with photos, huzzah!
8:23am -9:40am : Woke up, showered, prettified myself for the day – all that jazz. Then, I went surfing…
Web surfing, of course. I live in London, Ontario people – come on now!
As much as I’d love to try surfing for real, it wouldn’t really fit into my morning routine, what with having to fly to the coast and all.
Plus, I like to multi-task by eating breakfast while I take my morning jaunt around the net.
I don’t suspect it would be very easy to balance my cereal on a surf board.
I eat big breakfasts, fyi. Brain food:
10:15am - A REALLY BIG THUNDERSTORM CAME!
10:20am - The sweet thunderstorm was over and I went back to studying.
11:45am ish - Drove downtown to get the zipper on my broken boot replaced.
1:00pm -2:00pm ish - Went Grocery shopping, because I didn’t actually make it to Loblaw’s before the store closed the other night. #fail
2:45pm - Watching TV and chopping celery in my kitchen. Suddenly, I realize that it’s 2:45 in the afternoon and I start busting my booty to finish up with the produce preparation.
A phone interview in the J-school studio at 3:30pm means I need to leave the house at 3:00pm to make it in time.
3:07pm - locking my front door and putting on my shoes at the same time. I jog to school in the rain and arrive, soaking wet, with 2 minutes to spare
3:30pm – 3:51pm – A great interview with an official from the Alzheimer’s Society of Canada for my medical feature story.
I spent the next two hours transcribing said interview / answering emails / chatting with classmates…
and then it was off to yoga.
6:30pm – 7:30 pm – Ommm….
(I would have taken a photo, but cameras aren’t allowed in the class. I wonder why that is?)
I got to touch my first iPad tonight and it was dirty magical.
James was kind enough to let me play with his brand new bouncing bundle of joy…
And then she was called away for something even dirtier…
(Yes, this was my idea. Yes, I’m a nerd. Stfu.)
Then, the iPad got passed around the room, that little floozy!
But it’s not the gadgets that bring me out to Geek Dinner, of course – it’s the awesome people (PHRONK) I get to hang out with when I’m there.
Oh, how I want an e-reader… and server colocation.
Someday… When I’m less poor and more rich.
As for the iPad, I’m waiting for it to come to Canada and depreciate in price a little bit before I rush out to buy one.
It’s a sweet, pretty toy – no doubt about it – but I get by just fine with my laptop and blackberry.
I’ll probably buy an iPod touch soon to bridge the gap, but I think I’ll wait on the iPad until the next generation comes out.
Hopefully, it will be able to withstand my blender.
I saw this in the hall at Chaucer’s, btw, and I like it. So I took a picture.
And then I drove home from Geek Dinner in the rain. The pretty spring rain
It’s now 2:02 am and I AM LE SOFA KING TIRED!
Geeksta Rap, Nerdcore Hip Hop, Filk – call it what you will (I call it Awesome Sauce). Nerdcore has become one of my favourite musical genres over the past year. Check out this gem that I just stumbled upon during one of my tumblr binges…
The geek is now damn cool Solid.
I jammed out to this track for the first time while walking to school the other day. I was like “YAH! YAH! SING IT BROTHER! OMG, SO TRUE! BWAHAHAHA!”
Like I’ve said before – I must look straight batty when I’ve got my headphones in.
Anyways, this song is so good that I put it on repeat for the walk home and got a little bit memorized. Productive, right?
Presenting “I’m not your personal I.T. Guy” by Devo Spice.
Shashashasha – do you love it???
I would like to take a moment to dedicate this song to all of the random people out there (don’t feel singled out – there are LOTS of you, trust) who send in emails asking me to “explain Twitter”; asking me how to adjust Facebook privacy settings; asking me how to “make a website”; asking me straight up if I can make a website for them.
Hey n00b – Let me f*cking Google that for you. That’s how I learned almost everything I know. Yes, I did do some programming in university, but I also built my first website when I was 14. It was hideous and had about a kajillion errors in the code, but I did it myself with the help of search engines, online tutorials and a whole lot of good ol’ fashioned right clickin’ source viewin’. I kept playing, reading, learning, and eventually… I got better at it. If I could figure out how to set up a mySQL database before I was old enough to drive a car, you should be able to change your password on Twitter by yourself… right? Or maybe not. Maybe I’m just a big ol’ jerk for thinking this way. keeheehee…
(Family members and homies, please take note – these comments are directed towards the randos. In other words, yes Mom, I will still burn your DVDs for you, and yes, friends, I will continue to guide you through the process of setting up your own blogs.)
I could rant on about this for a very long time, but I’ll spare you and just bask in my own self righteous smugness while you read the lyrics to Devo Spice’s phat little ditty:
I’m not your personal I.T. Guy
CHORUS : Click on help. (Call someone else!)
Or figure out how to freakin’ (Google it yourself!) (4 times)
Oh look, you can’t configure your Outlook again
Well maybe you should write the settings down, my friend
But that might require a little effort from you
And Mr. Big Shot has more important things to do
It’s fine if I have to explain it one time
But we’re at number 29 and I’m losing my mind
So I’ll just drop everything, deadlines be damned
And explain again though I know you’ll never understand
Close all of those windows, let’s begin
Click on this, click on that, now put your password in
See, you don’t need to be a total wiz
No, I don’t know what your password is
Why are your problems automatically mine
No, it’s fine, I’ve nothing better to do with my time
But it’s not like I ask you every day for help
When I make a dookie and I can’t wipe myself
So what were you trying to do when the error appeared?
Then I curse, ’cause it’s even worse than I feared
I see your PC is an ancient jalopy
And you’re trying to copy a DVD onto a floppy
First of all, where’d you even get a floppy disk?
‘Cause really, I didn’t think those things still exist
Secondly, I don’t want to be a spoil sport
But that’s an ethernet cable, that’s a USB port
If you buy something new and don’t know how to hook it up
It doesn’t make you less of a man to look it up
You claim you’re not an idiot, well prove me wrong
And stop giving me more material for this song
“Hey Tom. I was wondering if you could help me out.
(Oh, here we go.)
I picked up a PC on ebay and got a great deal.
It’s a Pentium “eye-eye” with 16 “M.B.” of “R.A.M.”, whatever that is, and it’s running at 120 “M.H.Z.”
Is that fast? And I want to see about installing Windows 7 on it. Can you help me out with that?
(Bill Gates couldn’t help you do that.)
Anyway I got a great deal on it.
(No, you got ripped off.)
So I bought some songs from the Windows Media store and I can’t get them onto my iPhone.
I was wondering if you could help me with that. Also I’m working with some pictures I took. I downloaded PhotoShop from this web site I found
and I can’t find the red-eye reduction button. Do you know where it is? Oh, and while I was on that web site I got an alert that my PC was infected with a virus, so I clicked on it and downloaded a bunch of software.
So I should be protected now, but my PC seems to be running awfully slow all of a sudden.
(Well yeah, NOW you’re infected.)
I was wondering if you could give me a hand with that. Give me a call when you get this. (I most certainly will not!)
Thanks, Tom. Bye!
It happens every day, and I can’t get away
‘Cause they follow me around like a dog who wants to play
I know when my phone rings my day will be wrecked
When my boss says “Tom, can I see you for a sec?”
A second rapidly becomes an hour and a half
I would laugh, but I’m not part of the IT staff
So I don’t know what I’m doing, I just click around and curse
And pray to various gods that I don’t make the problem worse
Funny how I said before this day was gonna drag
Now I’m workin’ quick ’cause his cologne is making me gag
He says I have to fix it and it can’t wait till later
And somehow it’s my fault he never backed up his data
There’s still a couple quirks and it’s making me berzerker
Dammit Jim, I’m a Mac, not a miracle worker
And when I finally fix every problem he ever had
My uncle calls asking ’bout his son’s Leap Pad
You can download the track for free at The Fump.
Ahhhh culture. Identity. Humans… I’m getting sleepy, don’t mind my brain vomit.
I think I’ll start to do a bit more research into this subculture. Like, beyond compulsively downloading and LOLing at singles. I’ll be producing a radio piece about it soon Oooh, maybe I can even host a screening of Nerdcore Rising as part of the project! I’ve been wanting to do that forever!
On a related note, I’ll also be writing a feature article on the big business of nerd merch for one of my elective classes (forthcoming). That’s going to be fun to write – and dangerous for my bank account.
I guess I really AM on the geek beat, eh? Happens to the best of us, I suppose. They say that journalists tend to gravitate towards what they know and what they’re interested in. I’m seeing a lot of this at J-school among my classmates already.
I guess it’s better to be known as the geeky tech girl than say, the middle eastern conflicts girl or the municipal politics girl, right?
Ideally, I’d be the go-to “hilarious interviewer of famous people / front row fashion show correspondent / professional television watching and frozen yogurt eating” girl. Maybe someday
Now, check out this sweet geeky ink if you please. I’ve always said I’d never go there, but who knows? Maybe when I mark a milestone or something I’ll shell out for a very subtle, not-visible-when-clothed version of something like this…
And I’ve always loved this…
I need to crashhhhh, jayze!
It’s been a long day. I worked on my trucker ladies documentary all morning, had class this afternoon, went to see Andrew Keen speak after school (effing suhWEET, btw – dedicated blog post on said talk forthcoming, if I can find the time), went back to the studio to do some more work, and then shuffled on home and well… here I am.
Gorgeous weather out there though, eh? I love me some pre-spring springyness
Eeee! This makes me restoopulous happy. If I stay in 1st place until the end of March, I’ll win something super super awesome. Something that’s almost as awesome as Nate Black.
As you (should) know, Google finally released its highly anticipated new smartphone today – THE NEXUS ONE, RAHHH!!!
This insanely powerful little sweetheart has as much RAM (512 MB) as my laptop did before SDubz upgraded me for Xmas. Yet, unlike my chunky D-E-double-hockey-sticks GARBAGEMACHINE (which, at the tender age of three is considered both elderly AND obese), the Nexus weighs a mere 130 grams and is about as slim as a standard #2 pencil.
Beat THAT, Rachel Zoe.
*shudders and eats a poutine cupcake*
Anyways, my new fantasy gadget is manufactured by HTC and runs the Android mobile operating system – which just so happens to rock the cutest logo in the history of smartphones. I guess that doesn’t really say a lot, as smartphones don’t really have a super long history… but the logo is cute as fahk – how ‘boot I just say that?
Not gunna lie – I want this phone. I love my BB, sure, but I’m a bit of a Google fanboy – fanGIRL, rather – fan person, perhaps? Anyways, with it’s 5MB auto-focus camera, light & proximity sensors, native gmail application, GPS w/ voice directions, 512 Megs of internal Flash storage and 1Ghz Qualcomm 8250 processor (I don’t even know what that last part MEANS but it sounds badass), the Nexus One makes my BB Curve look like an overweight retarded chick wearing pink sweatpants.
And wtf is this supposed to be? Really – I want to know! Aside from their logo fail and MULTIPLE service outages over the holidays, I’m still pretty happy with my baby… sheeet, I don’t have much of a choice, do I?
It’s not like we can even get the damn thing up here in the great white North anyways. Yes, much like Hulu, Pandora, Fage and firearms at the grocery store, Google’s superphone is not available in Canada. Furthermore, it starts at $529.00USD (sans plan) so I wouldn’t be able to afford it anyways. Bah Humbug
If you’re interested, you can go check out all the nexus
porn pics, deets and developments for yourself via mashable.
I’m outskis – the newsroom’s starting to get buzzy again… finally. Slow day for news = Nizzle ‘researching’ potential stories = boring.
As one of my professors once said, news doesn’t happen in the newsroom – it happens out there in the big exciting city of London (heh heh heh…) I want to research at the mall – at the drugstore – at the muthafuggin’ corner of Dundas and Richmond! I bet there are tons of stories there. I hate to sit still.
I really, really do.