Posts tagged parties
WIN IT: Tickets to the official Universal Music Canada After Party
Jun 10th
Hooly hoooooo!
It’s that time of year again kids — the one affectionately referred to by T-listers and media types under thirty five (ish?) as “NXNEMMVA Weekend.” (NXNE + MMVA, get it?)
This is my fourth such weekend (remember the very first? holy crow was I dorky, awwww) and wouldn’t you know it that I finally had the bright idea to take a few vacation days to enjoy it properly? Same goes for TIFF 2013. BOOYAH. I’m brilliant.
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Being that I won’t be ON DUTY for the MMVA portion of the fiasco this year (ie; rolling around with a microphone or camera,) I’m able to hit the exclusive NO PICTURES / TWEETS / VINES / KEEKS / GRAMS / AUTOGRAPHS / FRIG OFF NOOBS Universal Music Canada After party with Virgin Mobile, presented by Blackberry.
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This will be a sick party.
Last year, I rolled around on the top of a bus with the guys who sing the song that goes “Poppin bottles in the ice, like a blizzard, When we drink we do it right gettin slizzard” and then when I got inside the actual venue… well, it was good
A really good party.
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Want to come to this year’s party?
YOUR GIRL HAS GOT THIS. (As in me. I’m your girl.)
All you need to do is Tweet both me (@laurenonizzle) and Universal Music Canada (@universalmusicC) using the hashtag #UniAfterparty.
Example: “Hey @universalmusicC and @laurenonizzle — bring me to the #UniAfterparty!”
Make sure you’re following both accounts (so that we can DM you) and that you’re able to be in Toronto Sunday evening.
Winner will be chosen at random. If you win, you will be awarded two spots on the party’s Guest List — one for you, one for a friend. Without a name on that list, you won’t be able to get in, and if you attempt to take photos of someone inside the club or act like a fankid, you’ll be tossed. Fair warning.
BE COOL and join me on the dance floor. I’ll be the girl doing this:

P.S. — This hilarious video goes out to all of my fellow millennials. Mad cute (and painfully true in some parts *cough* like the iced coffee part…)
UPDATE, JUNE 13: CONTEST NOW CLOSED. THANKS TO ALL ENTRANTS AND CONGRATULATIONS TO WINNER DAN TEOH!
Space men, Thug Kitchen, Luck of the Irish…
Mar 20th
*turns around slowly* Oh hello there, friend. I didn’t see you come in… to my blog…
You guys know Bobak, right? Bobak Ferdowsi?
As in the brilliant-hot flight director on the Mars Science Laboratory Curiosity mission / “NASA Mohawk Guy” supermeme I covered (multiple times) at work / boy I told you I was going to marry on this here blog last August? SPACE BIEBER OF SUMMER 2012?!?

I randomly walked into him on Saturday under the St. Party’s Day tents. Talk about luck of the Irish, eh?
I could barely believe my eyes. What are the chances that a) some superfamous NASA rockstar would be chilling out in Toronto on (day before) St. Patrick’s day? b) that I’d run into him and c) that he’d be cool and kind enough to let me talk his ear off about how much I love Curiosity’s adventures, and then take some pictures with me.
I don’t even care that my eyes are pink and my tongue is green. ‘TWAS THE SEASON.
I haven’t fangirled that hard since I met moot, which would probably be weird to you if you knew of all the band guys and actor guys I’d interviewed since then. Not even a humble brag — I just really get excited over smart people. SPASE PEEPOLE.
Thursday’s night’s episode of CBC Live Online was pretty amazing.
Big ups to producer Fabiola Carletti for giving me a chance to speak with retired astronaut Dave Williams, Edward Tabarah of the Canadian Space Agency, and Chris Hadfield’s son / social media manager Evan Hadfield on the day that Canada (okay, a Canadian commander) took control of the ISS!
That experience, combined with rogue fashion week activities, solid hangouts with funny friends, some cool stories at work and… some other stuff… made for a really good week. It’s been a rough month and it’s been nice to get my head up out of that fog a bit. Fingers crossed that the swing keeps ticking up?
*sigh* time will tell.
Here are some more photos from St. Patrick’s weekend if you’re into the Green&Green&Green&Green&Green…
P.S. Thug Kitchen is my new food bible. Peep this healthy shhh:
WIN IT: Tickets to St. Party’s Day in Toronto 2013
Mar 14th
Sláinte chugaibh, my friends!
As many of you know, I’m a festive kind of gal.
I’m also Irish-ish. IrISH?

While I strongly identify as a Canada-born Euromutt (more French than anything, tbh) I feel a special connection to the Irish part of my heritage. I’m proud to be descended from the fierce O’Neills of County Tyrone! My last name may be anglicized, but the older and more like my father and grandfather I get, the more I understand how much of my personality is influenced by that part of my family; The sense of humour, the hyperbolic storytelling, the prankster gene, the feistiness…
As historian Carl Wittke puts it:
“The so-called Irish temperament is a mixture of flaming ego, hot temper, stubbornness, great personal charm and warmth, and a wit that shines through adversity. An irrepressible buoyancy, a vivacious spirit, a kindliness and tolerance for the common frailties of man and a feeling that ‘it is time enough to bid the devil good morning when you meet him’ are character traits which Americans have associated with their Irish neighbors for more than a century.”
Hilarious hotheads. Hi.
That’s me and my friend Jilly a few years back on a visit to Dublin. I did a tour of Southern Ireland after that. Got fresh with the Blarney Stone
I love Ireland. Every member of my family has been there now, though none of us together except for mom and dad. If ever I strike it rich somehow, that’s where we’ll go. Right after I ride ALL OF TEH ELEPHANTS in everywhere.
That’s not to say this has anything to do with St. Patrick’s Day — at least, the North American incarnation of it.
St. Patrick’s Day in Canada / The U.S. is it not be the most traditionally-rooted (or heck, even respectful) of holidays — but it’s not supposed to be. We here in Canada don’t celebrate St. Patrick’s Day as an Irish holiday (though Newfoundland has declared St. Patrick’s Day a public holiday — one of only two cities outside of Ireland to do so ) — we celebrate it as a tribute to who WE are as modern descendants of old Irish clans, and we celebrate the fun-loving traits we’ve inherited from said ancestors.
Plus, it’s good craic!
I’d like to invite everyone out there to join me at the MASSIVE St. Party’s Day bash in Toronto this weekend — and I’m giving away two pairs of tickets to make it even easier for you to do so!
EVENT DETAILS:
St Party’s Day is going to be bigger and better than ever! This year the event will take place over 2 days at Ontario Place
This 2 day festival will include massive heated tents, authentic Irish music and dancers, live DJ sets, the official Budweiser Big Rig and 15,000+ attendees where you will be sure to see that old high school friend.
Event:
Saturday March 16th – 11:00AM – 8:00PM
Sunday March 17th – 11:00AM – 8:00PM? BUY TICKETS NOW ?
www.stpartysday.com/tickets
TO ENTER:
- Simply comment below with your name, email address and ONE THING you love about St. Patrick’s Day in Canada
- OR email me with the same information
- Winner will be announced Friday, March 15

Love, Style, Nick Kroll and Cherry Noir…
Feb 17th
Seany Dubs, you are one heck of a sport.
Excuse the weird hair. I was… trying something.
The above photo was taken for Elle Canada last week during a party celebrating the launch of Grey Goose’s new flavoured vodka, Cherry Noir (that stuff is dangerously good, for the record.)
Barbora was searching the Thompson for Stylish couples to feature, and being that I’m a major Elle fangirl (and compulsive attention-seeker) when she asked me if we’d be down I didn’t even hesitate to say “Yes, of course!” to her and “WE ARE TOTALLY DOING THIS YOU HAVE NO CHOICE” to Sean.
He really didn’t have a choice (do boys ever in matters such as these?), nor did he quite understand what was going on (again – do boys ever in matters such as these?)… until the next week when the resulting image and blurb popped up in the FlipBoard accounts of half the people in his office.
Love you?
Walshie could teach a course in plus-one-ing, I swear. The best I ever had.
We had a pretty low-key Valentime’s day this year, just as we wanted it (minus the working late); Dinner at Fresh, flowers and chocolate, funny teevee, snuggles… I also wore EARRINGS.
This is rare, but I bought some little red hearts when I was 13 that I never ended up tossing out. Thus:
Earlier that day, I got to chat with some online dating website CEOs in a special Valentine’s Day episode of CBC News Live Online.
Jerry of FarmersOnly.com (Which is a real, super successful dating service for, well, farmers only) made my day with some of his comments. You can take the girl out of Chatham…
I also wrote about some particularly fun things this week: A Tamagotchi App (!!!), Thirsty Marco Rubio, Internet feminists vs. trolls, Lighting striking the Vatican hours after The Pope’s big announcement, Pluto, a disabled goldfish’s wheelchair (!!!) EX-CETERA.
And while I’m spontaneously rambling on about my week, I crushed some madddd errands too.
It’s kind of nice to walk around the city in the morning, getting things did. I snapped this photo on my way back to west-downtown after hitting St. Lawrence Market.
A whole newwww worrrrrrrlllllld.
OH! And Nick Kroll tweeted back to me yesterday. Like, actually. !
@nickkroll will you go to the poutine dance with this hoser?
— Lauren O’Neil (@laurenonizzle) February 16, 2013
@laurenonizzle I’ll have to see if @anjulie will let me go w/ someone else.
— nick kroll (@nickkroll) February 16, 2013
I die.
You should probably watch this to make sense of that… and also because it’s hilarious. One of the funniest things I’ve seen in a very long time, actually. Not sure if it’s because I’m Canadian or not.
Lastly, please enjoy the RIGHTEOUS (and semi-deserved) mean mug I’m getting in the background of this shot. Too good:
Homie’s throwing me mad shade for that silly duckface in my mind, and I can’t say that I blame him. Few things I love more than funny background people in any photo, let alone the ones I’m in!
For more on the Grey Goose Cherry Noir After Dark party at the Thompson (it was a solid one, for real – we got GEMS!) I recommend checking out SheDoesTheCity’s report as per yooje. Uje?
Night night.

Grammy Lulz and FASHUNSTUFF + Barklemore’s “Pet Shop”
Feb 12th
Hoy litens,
Yeah, I ball. But this post isn’t about me breaking the NFL’s Super Bowl party display thingies (Sahrry Commish! And I’m also sorry for my point of reference to you being a post on The Cut about how you sat next to Anna Wintour at Kimberly Ovitz’s show the other day.)
BEY-sically, I didn’t get time to finish the Weekend Wrap party post I had been working on last Monday (Maple-Rosemary donuts at the opening of 2ndFloorEvents! Diplo and the wasted masses at a Bud Light Platinum Party! SUPERBOWLSTUFF! Other Stuff! voila.) and I just really liked that photo… predominantly because I know what happened directly after it was taken (SMASH! Again, sorry Commish. Great party!)
ANYHOO, what I actually wanted to blog about this fiiiine Monday evening (but should have last night if I really wanted it to mean ANYTHING to ANYBODY who isn’t myself in the future since every major web outlet is full-staffed during major events now for instant gif coverage a la 2013): Grammy lulz.
PIMP CANE PRINCE is not even funny, just awesome. That “no puffy genital” wardrobe advisory that nobody followed anyway was pretty funny too, but alas, that was pre-Grammy.
In no particular (but semi-chronological at times) order, here are ten of the funniest things that happened at the 55th annual Grammy Awards last night, as remembered by my brain:
1. When Tyler the creator duckface photobombed Frank Ocean’s mom, deuces up. His Tweets throughout the night were hilarious too, if you’ve got the stomach for Tyler. Thank goodness I do
2. Jay-Z yelling “You’re Welcome!” after Lena Dunham’s boyfriend’s friend thanked him for something, drinking from his Illuminati chalice like a boss the entire time. Gotta love Jay.
3. T-Swift totally pwning her teenaged ex-boyfriend in front of everybody. I don’t know much about Harry Styles, but I wanted to hate him for girl power’s sake at that very moment. TEAM TAYLOR!
4. Speaking of Taylor Swift, Bwahahaha.
5. And also, WHITE PEOPLE DANCING!
I feel like Taylor Swift is a prettier, younger, more talented, farrrr wealthier version of myself sometimes. I really do.
These two just creep me out with their plastic faces.
6. Chris Brown Trying to throw some shade at Frank Ocean by sitting during his standing ovation and GETTING YELLED AT BY ADELE! Go Adele! I totally love her now.
7. Kelly Clarkson photobombing Ellen and Portia:
8. Bruno Mars’ hat, hehehe.
9. When Carrie Underwood’s dress’ screensaver turned on halfway through her performance. Oops! Teehee!
10. Ellen and Beyonce, presenting together…. Not at all funny, again, but great.
Speaking of Justin Timberlake though, WOAH. Talk about bringing sexy back… and forth, and back, and forth…
Gifs on Gifs on Gifs, girl!
I am now very tired and ready for sleep. Sleep is important you know. Listen to Amy:
Before I go, my picks for the best dressed on the 2013 Grammy Awards red carpet include:
T-Swift, Karlie Kloss, Rihanna, Bey, Count 2 Chainz, Adele (seriously, that outfit was perfect on her), Kat Denning, Kaley Cuocuo, and really I’m just naming off TV actresses I like at this point.
Worst dressed: Florence Welch, J-Lo (Why you gotta try so hard?), Carly-Rae Jepsen, Estelle and… I’m torn on Katy Perry.
Purrhaps I’ll add pictures to illustrate tomorrow. But for now, y’all can GOOGLE THEM. It’s past my bedtime.
Lauren does her dance thing. vine.co/v/b12jVWaV6DQ
— Sean Walsh (@frikshun) February 4, 2013

P.S. This is ruffing AWESOME:
New Year’s Eve 2012: It’s my party and I’ll blog if I want to…
Jan 3rd
Blog if I want to…

Blahh-ha-hawg if I wawnt tooooo…



You would blog too if it happened tooooo youuuu (doo doo doo doo!)
*record scratch*
Ugh, Get OFF of my blog Selena Gomez. That wasn’t the gif I meant to post. Your wholesome All-American beauty makes me feel like the Jessie Spano to your Kelly Kapowski and I do NOt feel like getting digitally egged by Beliebers again right meow, capickhee?
There, that’s the right one.
Google tells me that the song I just blang (blog-sang) to you was first performed by an artist named Lesley Gore in 1963. My only frame of reference for it is this classic scene from Problem Child in which Junior destroy’s that little flower pictured above’s birthday party. Shahaha.
Here a couple of fun tracks from 2012 to enjoy the rest of this post to:
My New Year’s Eve pre-party wasn’t ruined by a red-headed stepchild — in fact, it wasn’t ruined at all. It was effing awesome! That’s why I changed the lyrics of the song to say “blog” instead of “cry,” even though I didn’t actually blog duringthe party. Frig, I barely found the time to tweet!



I’ve hosted many a dorm-party, club-party, university party-house-party and after party in my day, but never before have I thrown a REAL GROWNUP PARTY in my own loft with over 40 people in attendance.
I set up a Photobooth for kicks and left it alone for the most part. About half of my guests used it — some to hilarious effect. The James Brown pictures are my favourite of the lot. This one of my brother’s friends and Sean makes me laugh too, for some reason… the family portrait aesthetic:

You can view the entire Photobooth set here.

I had a blast, and will definitely be doing this again, but holy kamole is throwing even a pre-party SO MUCH WORK between just two people.
If it hadn’t been for Sean (who did almost all of the foodstuff, half the hosting and 100 per cent of the A/V) I’d have spun out after 5 minutes. I must say, we’re a pretty dope team.

Sorry for the gratuitous mushy.
Making a Facebook event and texting your friends to come over is one thing, but then there are all of the actual party-time things to do, like buying and putting up decorations…


I didn't actually buy this.
Preparing food (sorry about all of the fire alarms, guys) …


Keeping the cat / guest of honour from swiping at anybody (To his credit, he was actually pretty good – hung out with the people the entire time.)
And then of course, there was the playlist (easy,) my wardrobe (EASY,) cleanup (WAY easier thanks to Saroox who took it upon herself to be angel of dishes — swear to god, best party guest / friend EVER) annnnnd the main event itself: Da bar.

Pretty, right?
At 6 p.m,, my bartop was organized and clean with all of my spirits and mixes where they should be. Martini glasses were at the ready for me to mix up some of the fun Whipped vodka cocktails Pinnacle sent me recipes for.

That semi-organized bar only lasted for about 30 minutes, but in that time I managed to make about 3 of the five recipes I’d picked out before-hand, plus a few impromptu cocktails with the different kinds of booze and mix guests brought over.
The ultra-sweet Whipped® Cream Pie (pictured above) was a hit among the younger ladies who, for some reason, always seem to have stomachs of steel.
• 2 part(s) Pinnacle® Whipped® Vodka
• 1 part(s) coconut rum
• 1 part(s) half & half
Shake over ice and strain into a chilled martini glass. Top with a dollop of Whipped cream.

Also popular was the Orange Cream (pictured to the left.)
I served these ones in gold party cups for the most part and didn’t get many photos (things got crazy) but my friends loved them. The word “dangerous” was tossed around a lot. Much like a Piña Colada, it’s easy to toss back a few too many of these pretty quickly. You don’t want to stop drinking. It just tastes so dang good…
• 2 part(s) Pinnacle® Whipped® Vodka
• 1 part pineapple juice
• 1 part orange juice
Shake with ice and strain into a chilled martini glass. Garnish with an orange slice and serve.
Eventually, bartending had to take a back seat to socializing and people went wild (or not-so-wild) with their own concoctions. Whipped cream vodka is actually pretty tasty mixed with diet cola.
You can find Pinnacle Whipped at liquor stores across the country for only $25 a bottle. BAM!
I brought some with me to share at 159 Manning when I left to go bartend Tim McCready’s BE NICE party with Raymi — at a proper bar that didn’t have chicken wings on it!


McCready's Dashiki

I served more PRB tall-cans Monday night than ever before in my entire life — chiefly because most of the bars I’ve worked at don’t sell tall-cans of PBR, but also because hipsters.
I met tons of interesting, nice, and in some cases severely attractive people. Time-warp band guys, what up
They don’t even need to open their mouths before I know that they’re musicians. A torturous sixth sense I’ve had since I was 14…
I didn’t get to walk around the party much, but when I did I was like “holy crap this is cool.”
People playing music all over the place, funny signs on the doors, and more cute fur collars than I could shake my stupid wizard hat toward. That doesn’t even make sense. I’m tired. Here are some photos:



More photos from NYE 2012 here.
I spent most of New Year’s Day sleeping and cleaning and sweating it out at the gym — nothing fancy.

Surprisingly, I wasn’t even hung over. Like, at all. Go figure that two days later I am now sick as a dog. *sigh* ain’t that the way though?
I’ve been making a list of dumb New Year’s Resolutions that I’ll share when I’m feeling better. For now, it’s back to the bed and the bottle (of cough syrup.)
Happy New Year, homies.


LOL’s 2012 Holiday Party Roundup Part 1 + IKEA MONKEY
Dec 10th
Of ALL the days to skip going to IKEA (which, so far, has been every single day of my life save for maybe 7 of them) I HAD to choose the one in which a monkey showed up to shop in a darling little shearling coat, making international headlines (and also this video:)
I can’t stop thinking about Ikea monkey. ALL DAY I’ve been thinking about him because he’s everywhere I look, and I ask myself — Why? Why didn’t I go to the North York Ikea at approximately 2 p.m. in the afternoon yesterday? Could it be because I hate Ikea? Because I don’t ever go to North York? Because I had better things to do with my time?!?
Well, yes for the first two and maybe for the third if you call getting groceries in the ghetto and watching cartoons better than meeting Darwin the It Monkey, with his undeniable superstar swagger (and I do.)
I was too busy exploring the wonders of the Doity Duff to catch the meme’s crescendo. That was my way-too-late-to-be-relevant submission to the pool.
Anyhoo, I would have at least written a story about Ikea Monkey at work today if several of my colleagues hadn’t already done so. Fortunately, Bowman’s Storify is really good so I can just link off to it here and finally put some closure to cute baby monkey gate 2012. Whew. What a day.
Now let’s get down to what I need to do: Write about parties. *sigh* When did my blog turn into that?
Methinks the lady doth go out too much…
But alas, it is December and, like September, this is a doozy of a month for my iCal.
I haven’t even had a chance to write about turning 27 yet (but I will – trust.)
This holiday season, I’m doing 140 character party reviews again just like I did during TIFF because:
A) The people who invite me to these parties mostly do so because they want me to blog about them.
B) If I took the time to write out full individual posts about each party I went to I wouldn’t have time to GO to any parties, let alone work all day and shop for Christmas and go to the gym and do all of the other things that keep me sane during this most cluster fizzed of seasons.
C) I could do short crappy posts about each party, but that’s not my style. I hate short crappy posts. Call me old school but I’ve always pictured myself as more Thought Catalog than 9Gag… With pictures. So maybe VICE? VICE minus all of the other writers and boobs and drug trips in the jungle and stuff. And make my blog more interesting to people other than me.
Here’s laurenoutloud.com’s 2012 Holiday Party Roundup PART ONE:
Lots of things coming up this week and next – I’ve already had to skip so many for sleep and sanity’s sake. I’m getting better at this in my old age, you see. Beauty sleep >; Late night McFiestas.
TICKET GIVEAWAY
Do you want to party with me Saturday night? I’d love it, and you can do just zat zis Saturday, Dec. 15th, at Oxford Beach’s 3rd Annual ‘A Toronto Christmas’ in support of GlassFrog!
I’ve got two tickets to give away. Read on to find out how to win!
From the event description:
“Toronto’s swankiest charitable Christmas party is back at Steam Whistle Brewery this holiday season!
The third annual A Toronto Christmas is proudly in support of GlassFrog International Aid Organization! Grab a festive cocktail dress or bow tie and join Toronto’s beautiful young professional crowd for a great cause!
The party starts at 9 pm with great live music by one of Toronto’s hottest cover bands, Stiffler’s Mom and continues with DJ Rouge and DJ Mike Wilson until 2:00am.”
.
Tickets are $40 each but, like I said, I’ve got a PAIR OF THEM to give away.
HOW TO WIN
I’m over Tweet2Win contests and sort of hate them a lot. So instead, comment below with the link to a cute holiday themed photo. Be sure to leave an email address and I’ll draw one random name from all of the entries to win the pair of tickets by Friday morning. Voila!
Allow the the 12 Days of Grumpy Cat Christmas over at Burrzfurrrrd to inspire you:
The dressy parties start this weekend
Tidings of comfort and joy,

All I really want is GIRLS (Season 2. Right now.)
Dec 9th
HBO is a network that gets away with things most others can’t; gory vampire orgies, full frontal male nudity, storylines that would make Sue Johansen blush and like, infinity boobies, everywhere, all the time.
It is the best.
Thus, it stands to reason that HBO could get also away with throwing a weeknight party in the east end of Toronto (I’m talking PAST the Distillery District) and still draw a pretty hype crowd.
Hashtags don’t lie: Toronto loves Girls.
This particular Torontonian is OBSESSED with the show (and watching old people freak out over it), and much like Game Of Thrones, Breaking Bad, and every other series I binge-watched this year I’m dying for the next season to start. Have you seen the trailer for Season 2 of girls yet? It made me laugh and cry and want to go buy things. God bless America.
Fortunately, Season One of girls is on DVD now to tide us all over until January 13 (now THAT’s a gift bag goodie I won’t be regifting. Thanks mother HBO) and cast members have been doing the rounds to promote it, and the upcoming second season.
Allison Williams was at HBO’s party on Tuesday night for a little Q&A with Shinan Govani:
She didn’t give out her dad’s phone number or any dirt on the rich-kid art school douchebags she works with, but she was funny and charming and emphasized the importance of getting an education (homegirl went to Yale, where she was on an improv troupe. I love her.)
Later, there was a mob&greet of sorts. I got to chat with her for a few minutes about school and hair and clothes and just being a girl in her 20s. Her dress was Oscar De La Renta and she was stoked to be wearing it, saying something along the lines of “I feel lucky whenever I get to wear something like this.”
She was so gracious. Humble. Kind. Chill. She even touched my sock bun! We took a selfie:
For more on the party, here’s Paul’s comprehensive review on The Grid. All the deets you want and need except for the fact that this song played at least 3 times in the hour and a half that I was there.
Bon nuit, mon amis! I’m off to dream about manbearpig and personal butler robots who bring me plates of bon bons like the one in that Cheeky Bingo ad and living in New York City with my own hit TV series and a pug to walk in the park…
Choupette Lagerfeld and the Porn Theatre Halloween Party (#PTHP)
Oct 30th
Looking for something to do, wear, or watch on Oct. 31st?
Halloween is only two days away now, and rumour has it that most of you won’t be trick or treating…
That’s not to say that you won’t need a costume though.
Rain or no raincain, it’s still the most wonderful time of the year
Would you really be going outside to trick or treat anyway? If you’re young enough to trick or treat without having to put on a mask on and speak in a really high voice like I did until I was 19, you’re probably not old enough to handle the type of images I post on this blog.
That one comes to you via my homie Brock McLaughlin and the Porn Theatre Halloween Party crew. THAT is what’s up on Halloween proper in Toronto this year, out of the rain, among cool cats, away from the deeby club thumping masses of King West…
The way it was described to me was basically “Awesome party in the old porno theatre, and we’re going to cut together all of the porny scenes from horror films, and play them on the big old porno theatre screens while we party” or something. SO MANY CALORIES YOU WILL BURN!
Paul describes it much better on The Grid’s night list this week. 10 dollah, hollah.
I’ll be there, though I’m not quite sure what I’ll be wearing yet.
On Saturday, I went as Choupette Lagerfeld because I needed something fast and cheap and easy to dance in (More on THAT special adventure in a few days!)
Most people assumed I was a simple sassy housecat. *eyeroll*
I’ll admit that it was hard to tell I was a siamese ragdoll when I took off my white coat, and without the Kaiser by my side it was difficult to know which Siamese cat, specifically, I was imitating.
I should have worn a faux chanel collar, perhaps, or carried and ici c’est un place du chat pillow, but heck, I was busy! Not everybody is fortunate enough to have maids do all their bidding…
My paws are numb from #NYFW. Translation: Maid, rub my feet & repolish my talons.
— Choupette Lagerfeld (@ChoupettesDiary) September 15, 2012
I’m undecided as to what I shall be on Wednesday for REAL Halloween, but I’ve been rounding up some fun ideas and will publish my bighugelist tomorrow. In the meantime, you’re welcome to snipe my fashion kitty idea.
Warning though: If you’re going to be Choupette, you’d better come correct. Karl Lagerfeld does not take kindly to crass imitations.

GROSS. Cute cat though.
Love always,

Paws Gala 2012: 99 Problems but a Bitch Ain’t One (ft. Theron Humphrey & Maddie)
Oct 10th
Thursday, Thursday, THURSDAY!
Scratch that — let’s call it FURsday! *ba dum tisk* Waka Waka Waka!
When I was little I would say that line constantly, just like Fozzie Bear on the Muppet Babies after he would make a joke — except weird little Lauren would say it after everything.
“Mommy, Can I have some apple juice? WAKA WAKA!”
If I were a rapper, I’d name myself in Fozzie Bear’s honour and wear a $100,000 chain featuring his likeness around my neck erryday… IF SOMEONE HADN’T ALREADY DONE THAT!
Waka Flocka Flame: “Welcome to the Goodburger, can I take your orrrrder?”
Me: “Yeah, I’d like my steez back, please.”
Waka Flocka Flame: “It was mine first, and who says ‘steeze?’ anyway?”
Me: “I don’t know… people in California circa 2007?… Whatevs. We can share this Fozzie Bear thing if you give me that chain and two veggie burgers to go.”
And then this happened:
Now that the obligatory “Slap my discoloured duckface onto something else’s body” and “Make fun of rappers” bits are out of the way, Let’s talk about Paws for the Cause.
Paws for the Cause is a Toronto-based organization that raises money for a different animal welfare organization every year.
On Thursday, the group hosts its annual fundraiser — The most adorable in Toronto by far, if you ask me. (And you should ask me.)
Proceeds from this year’s gala will be going to the Central Toronto Veterinary Referral Clinic’s Cares Foundation to help subsidize lifesaving surgery costs for animals in need. Funds raised will also go toward the Chloe Award, which has been presented to an outstanding University of Guelph veterinary student.
Last year’s gala raised $75,000 — that’s a whole lot of canine lives saved!
This year, the Paws Gala will feature an art exhibit with Instagram sensation Theron Humphrey of This Wild Idea and his famous dog, Maddie the Coonhound of Maddie on Things.
SHE CAN STAND ON ANYTHING!
I’m going to ask Theron if he can balance Maddie on my head. We’ll see how that goes.
Here are the deets:
When: Thursday, October 11, 2012
No, but WHEN?: 8pm till late
Where: 99 Sudbury
How: Tickets can be purchased here. Wear something cute. It’s a fashionable people party.
Woof,
















































































