Posts tagged internet
TAKE MY PICTURE: The art and offense of fashion week peacocking
Mar 13th
Image by Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed
Ladies and skirt-clad gentlemen;
Just say no to strutting around outside Fashion Week venues wearing ridiculous crap so that people (know you want them to) take pictures of you. Or say yes, I don’t care.
It would probably be a good idea for you to watch this new mini-doc by Garage Magazine exploring “the rise of ‘peacocking’ street style stars as a result of the proliferation of blogs” before you decide to go full-out these guys though (I don’t even know them and I hate them.)
As some fashiony person says in this most blogworthy of videos by Garage Magazine, “I feel that anyone who dresses with the intention to get photographed will NOT get photographed by the right people”
That video was even jucier than I expected it to be (but not quite so juicy as the kerfuffle-causing “The Circus of Fashion” article penned by Suzy Menkes a few weeks ago.)
“HA!… ha HA!.. SO TRUE!… HA!” I found myself saying throughout the course of this 9-minute-long video; though I’m sure a large part of that is due to jealously. The only people who take pictures of me on the street during fashion week are pantsless men in white minivans who think I’m actually a Japanese schoolgirl.
For real though homies, posing on rocks all nonchalantly in an waiting for people to take pictures of you just seems so LAME AND OBNOXIOUS. As obnoxious as seeing people doing that in a video on the internet and then going home to blog about it. UGH.
Like, look at Anna Dello Russo at minute 4:05. LOOK AT HOW STUPID THAT IS!
If the incredibly rich and powerful editor-at-large of Vogue Japan can barely get away with it, you’d better bet your bottom loonie that neither can some aspiring RP T-Lister from Thornhill.
I’m not trying to diss street style OR narcissism — I’m clearly all about both of those things. I simply hate humourless douchebaggery, and despite the fact that I’m neither old, new or future guard, I can relate to alot of what these OG fashion insiders are saying.
The way they speak so longingly about the good old days before everybody and their iPhone could play fashion editor… the disdain they show for the blogger-n00bs who’ve invaded THEIR space, crowding it, changing it, soiling it with cheap uninitiated, unearned nonesense… that’s exactly how a lot of us OG internet people feel about the web lately.
Our world has been infiltrated. It’s no longer a precious space. Things have changed. C’est La Vie?
Do yourself a favour and read THIS piece by Zan McQuade for The Daily Dot. It’s smart and true:
Anyhoo, I’ve got to go to bed because Toronto’s (pre / rogue / off-site) fashion shOws kick off tomorrow and I need to wake up early to prepare a dope outfit. I’m thinking of copying the outfit at the top of this post to a T, pretty much, so nobody else wear it okay?
P.S. Earl Sweatshirt, WHOA:
That.
POKExFASHION: Where Miu Miu meets Mewtwo
Jan 25th
Some things fit together so naturally, so logically, that you don’t even need to think about them — they just kind of go, like socks and feet, bread and toasters, gumzy and keebler 3…
These things are boring.
I wear socks in my hair, mmkay? And as for bread, I ball that ish up, dip it in hot sauce and toss it into my mouth like a soggy little timbit of FIRE.
Gumzy and keebler3 are actually just awesome and not boring at all. I stumbled upon that older adults from Virgina dater hookup thread while searching for “pairs of things that go together.”
Either the whole lot of characters there is inadvertently hilar, or I’m just severely overtired. Whatever the case, it’s greatest thing I’ve stumbled upon in the past half-hour.
Found this gif there, too. GOLD, JERRY, GOLD!
Anyhoo, this Pokémon x Fashion blog is also great, because unlike all of the things I mentioned above, Pokémon and Fashion aren’t the likeliest of combos. And yet it works, so very very well.
Turns out I’m not the only human out there who loves both Clefairy and Céline, Tentacruel and Thierry Mugler, Diglett and Dior (Not sure if the pokexfashion artist actually made any of these combos, I just like alliteration)
WHO KNEW? Facebook, probably. Also, all of the fashion webzines. Stylecaster first reported on pokexfashion back in July of 2011 and Refinery29 had it in December of that same year.
A whole bunch of outlets came along like “hurr durr lookit so cool” last week and now I’m like “HURRRRPDUURRRP I M COOL TOOOOO,” but like, I actually do like both fashion and Pokémon very much.
Exhibit A:
Exhibit B:
Exhibit Ugh, this isn’t about me. I’ll stop. Throwback Thursday, woo!
Wow, Sir Snarksalot up in here eh? I’ll tone it back. Hecka stressed out right now. Sometimes it comes out in sonnnnng! But not now.
Here are a few more cool posts from pokexfashion, which Internet tells me is run by a young man in ONTARIO (just like me!) called franny pack. FRANNY PACK, WHO ARE YOU? LET’S BE FRIENDS! DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR POKEMON CARDS? I’ll steal some from my brother.
Go check out the rest for yourself right here right meow!
Night night.
CatWang, New kicks, Star Like Me, BBD!
Jan 7th
*peers out from behind curtain of WAHHHH*
Hallo?
HALLO!
Hallo friends. I am BACKish now from my 4-day-stretch of flu-induced hibernation to BLOW YOUR MIND with the kind of wicked-ehss geekity goodness y’all know me for… or, rather, I would be if I hadn’t been laid out for 18 hours a day since this betch of a bug hit me, barely even able to Tweet – let alone eat. The upside to that: Willie helped me finish some cottage cheese the other day and it was adorrrrable.
The most I’ve actually been able to accomplish since Thursday was a trip to Sport Chek earlier this evening to buy some new running shoes and dayglo workout gear. I ain’t even mad if it was the cough medicine that influenced this particular purchase because my new kicks are chopahcalohpah:
I’m just making up words to troll you guys at this point.
I’ve actually been working pretty hard on a “Best of 2012″ post over the past couple of evenings. It’s taking a long time, but I suppose I should be thankful for that. I had one heck of a year.
Hopefully, I’ll get that one up right soon so that I can start cranking on some new blojects for 2013! I got some tings, I got some tings. But for now, please enjoy…
The fruits of my time spent playing with the CatWang iPhone app!!! It’s totally free and ridiculously fun (if you’re into putting lasers and cat heads and other cool things on your photos. Which you must be, if you’re here.)
This commercial for the HOT NEW SOCIAL NETWORK Star Like Me which was most certainly produced in a basement somewhere in the Eastern Bloc. Yeah, yeah, I know that the Eastern Bloc doesn’t exist anymore (as of 20 seconds ago — thanks Wikipedia.)
Facebook, Twitter, WATCH YO BACK(end)S — Star Like Me is taking over:
Bwahahahaha. <-- Yeah, that's the best joke I have right now, "Bwahahahaha." I'll provide the material - you provide the punchlines, guys, just for today (and maybe all of the Sunday mornings too.)
Azealia Banks dropped a new track on New Year’s Day called BBD (Bad B*tches Do it). “It’s Trap, but it’s Rave. it’s Banjee, But still a lil classy,” she said on Twitter. Love? Hate? Meh?
I was 6 and 7s about it until I listened to it for the 5th time. Now I can’t get enough of it, or the Angel Haze diss track (ooooh Diss track!) she dropped on Soundcloud yesterday, produced by MACHINEDRUM. It gets tight at 1:37: NERPRUHBLUMSNOPRUHBLERRRMS rah grumble grooo NOPRUUUHBRLEERMS.
Espice!
Hey guys… have you ever realized that THE BRAIN NAMED ITSELF?
Night night.
Modern Seinfeld, Classic Rap Memes and The Full Body Sweater
Dec 13th
Hey, Hi, Happy Humpday!
Would you rock a full-body cable knit sweater like this guy for reasons other than to get yourself plastered all over the geekblogs?
I would not. Even just looking at that noise makes me itch all over like there are botflies under every inch of my skin, which I’m kind convinced of anyway after I saw that thing on the Discovery Channel about botflies 5 years ago. This sweater makes me feel like my botflies have botlfies. IT’S A DOUBLE BOTFLY SWEATER.
Actual serious warning though: Don’t Google “botfly.” For real. Don’t.
You just Googled it, didn’t you?
Anyhoo, this is what I wore today:
The leggings are liquid. The shoes are wedges. The vial necklace is by Wildfox — one of my favourite (if not the most ridiculously overpriced) Australian fashion brands ever. I bought it as a birthday present to myself 
It reminds me of Sarah Michelle Gellar’s cross in cruel intentions, minus the drugs. I think I’m going to fill mine with perfume and pretend it’s loooove potion. What’s life without whimsy, eh?
GET IT?!? The Ice Cube Ice Cube button is one of my favourite old rap memes. Microsoft WORD is another, as well as all of the Wheelchair Drake and Joseph Ducreux archaic rap macros in existence pretty much.
I’ve had both of these kicking around in my “Images I like” folder on various laptops and hard drives for years along with hundreds of other timeless viral photos that seem to keep popping up on Tumblr and the like every now and again, which is why I was stoked to find this hilarious “Rap Memes” Facebook page that I followed for about a week. It disappeared before I could blog about it. Ain’t that the way? Google “rap memes” for some free-roaming lulz and remind me not to trust Facebook anymore.
Here’s something every bit as hilarious — if not more so — and a little bit more permanent than the Rap Meme Facebook page, I hope.
Follow Wednesday Modern Seinfeld. If you’re a hardcore fan of the show, you’ll appreciate these 140 character show pitches for a contemporary audience. It’s gold, Jerry, gold!
Elaine thinks an @nymag sex diary is about her. Jerry dumps his gf for being obsessed w/ Kate Middleton. Kramer spoils a TV show for George.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 11, 2012
Jerry’s beautiful girlfriend (Kelly Macdonald) dumps him after Jerry, on George’s insistence, uses an emoticon in a text.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 12, 2012
George “accidentally” sends a “reply all” e-mail in an attempt to get fired. He is promptly promoted for his gutsy attitude.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 12, 2012
Jerry has to stop using Google because he is dating Lydia Mapquest, heiress to the Mapquest fortune. Elaine waits for a Starbucks bathroom.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 12, 2012
Kramer gives Ted talk full of nonsense words, gets a standing ovation. George discovers that there’s a gay porn star named George Costanza.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 11, 2012
Elaine yells at her co-workers for loving Pinterest. Kramer becomes an @uber driver. George opens actual jerk store on Etsy.
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 10, 2012
@seinfeldtoday Kramer gets into Weird Twitter. Jerry obsesses over his stand-up special’s AV Club grade. Elaine hates “Girls.”
— Brendan (@oneillb1) December 10, 2012
Kramer runs into Crazy Joe Davola, learns he’s not crazy just autistic and mis-medicated. “He’s on the spectrum! The spectrum, Jerry!”
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) December 11, 2012
My gosh, just read the entire feed. I could go on for minutes and minutes — it’s one of the best uses of the medium I’ve seen in months. It’s the best, readers, THE BEST!
Last but not least, here’s Die Antwoord’s video for Fatty Boom Boom. It isn’t even close to new but it’s been in my backlog of things to blog about for months and I can’t stand not to post it any longer! So many drafts back there right now… you have no idea.
I’m really starting to miss the days when I could just blog about what I wanted to blog about every day. I should just put ads up and “monetize” the easy way already, eh?
I lied though. THIS is the last thing:
Hehe. Talk to you real soon, frands!
Chuck D hates me and 17 other things I learned this week
Nov 12th
by Ilse Valfre
Getting the attention of somebody famous on Twitter is an actual life goal for some people (who are 15-year-old girls.) In general, I find this stupid and sad; the celebrity idolization, the desperate longing for a stranger’s validation, the rooting of one’s identity in who they manage to associate with.
That’s not to say I wouldn’t print out and frame a retweet from Justin Bieber to hang up next to my degrees if that jerk would just NOTICE MY EXISTENCE, let’s be real.
Public Enemy’s Chuck D is an artist I adore who did notice my existence on Twitter the other day, just not in the way that I might have hoped had I been the type to hope for a celebrity’s attention on Twitter.
I didn’t really understand his reply other than the part where he calls me stupid, but I’m guessing Chuck D isn’t aware of the “someone below” account / the person below me screencaps phenom.
I tried to explain:
It was a joke, Chuck! I love you! Look – an action figure! bit.ly/SFUbCbRT @mrchuckd: @laurenonizzle stupid its a name in my family
— Lauren O’Neil (@laurenonizzle) November 8, 2012
If he saw my apology, he didn’t respond. I have angered Chuck D. I am Public Enemy’s enemy.
*sigh* it was fun while it lasted, Flav…
Wakestock 2010
Here are a few of the more interesting things I learned this week:
- In some cases, pregnancy tests can detect testicular cancer in men, and in at least one case, rage comics can save lives. “Redditors flag man’s positive pregnancy test as cancer” is one of the coolest stories I’ve had the pleasure of telling in a while.
- Speaking of Reddit, a subreddit dedicated to the kind of stuff that sucks me into strange 3 a.m. YouTube binges exists. Word to the wise: Don’t cruise through r/popping while you’re eating yogurt… or anything else. Trust me.
- Brazilian scientists are working to clone 8 different types of endangered species, including the jaguar, maned wolf, and black lion. Yay, progress!
- Dogs and deer can be friends. BEST FRIENDS.
- The Sharp Suits art project highlights very stupid things that clients have actually given to professional creatives as feedback. It is the best thing ever if you’ve ever worked in advertising or a related field.
- There’s an online support group for nice guys in existence. I didn’t even realize that people were struggling with an addiction to niceness (more accurately, the inability to be assertive.)
- This is what Junior from Problem Child looks like now:
- Seapunk. That’s why aquamarine hair is all over Tumblr as of late. Seapunk. But the subculture is about so much more (okay, a little bit more) than 90s hair and the fetishization of 90s culture. Read all about it here, and read all about if Rihanna just destroyed it with her SNL performance on Sunday night here.
- Fruit can be arranged in an homage to the Legend of Zelda. Curse the jerk who takes a bite out of Link first.
- Ryan Gosling and Steve Carell had a son. There’s not other explanation for this guy:
- Hey hey! Digital graffiti is a thing now, thanks to the F.A.T. lab’s WiFiTagger
- In 1979, Iranian militants stormed the U.S. embassy in Tehran and took more than 70 hostages. Six American diplomats managed to escape as the ambush took place and hid out in the home of Canadian ambassador Ken Taylor and his wife Pat. Ben Affleck’s Argo tells the story of how the CIA used a fake sci-fi flick to rescue them, and it’s incredible. Affleck’s dreamy face make it worth the watch alone, but learning all about the “Canadian Caper” is even better.
- According to The Atlantic’s, Alexis C. Madrigal, a “vast trove of social traffic is essentially invisible to most analytics programs.” He calls this DARK SOCIAL. Interesting points and a great read.
- OHMYGOSH, SOMEBODY IS PRODUCING THE MAGIC SCHOOL BUS, THE MOVIE!
Okay, not really. That’s a fan-made trailer, if you couldn’t tell. It’s cute though, and really makes me wish that somebody WOULD boot a Magic School Bus film that sees the kids (now grown-ups) taking a field trip to hell. Hollah if you’re up for the challenge and need somebody to play Satan.
Night night!
Big A** Message and The Herp Derp YouTube plugin
Jul 22nd
YouTube commenters are to the Internet what drunken young suburbanites are to downtown Toronto on a Saturday night; obnoxious, plentiful, and, for the most part, face palm-inducingly stupid.
In my experience, at least 90 per cent of the comments on any video – no matter how dope said video – are pointless, mean, completely incoherent or, you know, “FIRST.”
Some might say they’re downright freaking derpy… or develop a browser extension to that effect.
Meet my hero of the day: Tanner Stokes, creator of the Herp Derp YouTube comment converter plugin!
Released this month for Chrome, Safari and Opera (it’s been available for Firefox since January of this year), Stokes’ plugin turns all of the comments on any given YouTube page into a series of herps, derps and herp derps.
It is inspired.
You can reveal the actual comments underneath by clicking on them, if you’re into that, but Tanner recommends that you don’t.
Personally, I always look at the top two comments since they’re often pretty eye-opening and almost universally hilarious – whether intentionally or not.
In other news, I found this website called “BIG A** MESSAGE” the other day and I’ve been having some fun with it. It’s pretty dang simple, but there’s something ultra-lulzy about sending random creepy giant flashing messages to your friends in the middle of the night, you know?
Maybe this is why I don’t have many close friends.
Happy (day after) Caturday
Parody of the year: I’m Farming and I grow it (+ Maslow’s revamped heirarchy of needs)
Jul 7th
The Peterson Farm Brothers > LMFAO. Seriously, these clever and strapping young farm boys from Kansas or some place like that just put Berry Gordy’s offspring to shame.
In fact, I’m so impressed with the Peterson Farm Bros right now that I think they should be called LMFAO from now on.
The acronym can stand for something different, of course. “Livestock makes fertilizer all organic” or “Like my farming apron, Oprah?” or “Let’s Milk Foals And Oxen.”
Except maybe not that last one, because I don’t think it’s actually possible to milk a baby horse… or an ox, since they’re almost always male.
But I digress.
This videos has raked in almost 5 million views in less than two weeks on YouTube and actually prompted me to google “How to become a farmer.”
Congratulations, boys! Google has lead me to believe that I don’t have what it takes to be a farmer, but I LOVE being outside, am great with baby animals, and could probably learn how to bake a pie, so if you’re looking for a wife or a farm-crasher or something… Hollah.
I’m off to an early sleep tonight. Big morning tomorrow! But before I go, please enjoy this new and improved version of Maslow’s Heirarchy of needs:
That would be hilarious if it weren’t actually true. For the very same reason though, this picture is genuinely funny:
Shashashasha…
OH! AND HAPPY CATURDAY from laurenoutloud, Kurt Cobain, and Kurt Cobain’s kitty cat friends:
#RealMenLoveCats
Just give me a minute… (and also, sign the Declaration of Internet Freedom)
Jul 4th
Okayyyy? I am le busy imitating dog faces and setting off fire crackers and writing about important things like artificial lab-grown organs and digital freedom defenders and massive neural networks and The Olsen Twins, GAH.
Y’all are whack, PETA.
But you really should sign the Declaration of Internet Freedom, my friends (Canucks can sign here).
It’s important, whether you realize it or care or not. Don’t trust me — research it. Because if you don’t now and the laws this group is fighting to squash get passed, you won’t be able to research it in the future. Get it?
HIYAH!
Finally got some photos back from the Pride Parade! I’ll be writing about that tonight if I don’t get sucked into the snugggllleeezooooone for too long.
I passed right out in Seany’s arms last night. It’s nice to have him back home from stupid Vancouver. #TeamToronto
The Many (okay, a few) Faces of the Internet User: Which are you?
May 14th
image via FastCompany
When I started scrolling down this infographic I thought “HA! Great idea.” And then I passed the 7th panel and it was like “… uh…”
Is that it? Where are the mommy bloggers? The marketing deebs? The Nigerian Princes and game-day tweeters? The white knights, the Tumbling teens, the shameless social media gurus?
This is perturbingly incomplete and the references are dated, but it’s gorgeous nonetheless and jeepers why the heck am I griping about somebody else’s work?
THANK YOU, Flowtown, for making something cool. You rule. Your graphic designers especially.
Which category do you fall under? I’d put myself into the Meme Machine or Fact Finder. Actually, based on this post, I’m probably more of a critic.
(via Flowtown)
Sweet Brown gets autotuned and I dream of Jeannie(‘s ponytail)
Apr 23rd
If you liked Backin’ up, Backin’ up, Backin up (and who didn’t? WHO DIDN’T?!) you’re going to looooove the Sweet Brown remix:
Is that not a really, really good song? Even out of context, the soulful mix is dope. And the video? Well…
‘Nuff said. And if you don’t know who Sweet Brown is, watch the original viral video here:
Anyhoo, Antoine Dodson Sweet Brown is totally famous for another 15 seconds thanks to that remix, and I’ve got a new morning hype-track for another day or so (I’ve already been jamming to this for 10 so… ya know.)
Speaking of news memes though, did you know that Antoine Dodson is going to be at ROFLcon this year? Well OBBBBVIOUSLY he is. Everybody is. Including ME, WEEEEEE!
I’m going to run and tell that homeboy how much Canada loves him if I get a chance. Maybe Sweet Brown will come too. That would be gravy.
I put some purple in my hair this evening. With chalk.
It’s faint and only in the bangs. I’m going to go nuts with some turquoise later this week, but only on the ends, a la Kate Bosworth:
You know what’s fun on a Sunday night? Watching cheesy Raven-Symoné movies and teasing the heck out of your hair.
BIG PONYTAIL!
Oh oh oh, hold up now – what is THIS? I started watching this “Jane By Design” show on Netflix and I’m madly in love, not even 10 minutes in. HI BILLY:
Google tells me his real name is Nick Roux and that he’s a total Disney kid. Blergh. This gen’s Chad Michael Murray circa One Tree Hill season 1. *sigh*
Hehe, Oh Chad! Stop!
I’ve got to go to bed now…
PS – In case you were wondering, Sweet Brown finally got her cold pop! Awwww…
