Robster Gets His Lobster: A Victory for Internet Kind

Good afternoon, homies!

LOOK! A ROBSTER! (Please, before you accuse me of acting racist, read on…)

At approximately I-Have-No-Idea O’clock on February 22, 2012, Mr. Robert Mills of Redding California posted a complaint on Red Lobster’s Facebook page about the lack of free birthday dinners he had received from said fine seafood / delishcuits establishment.

You see, Robert Mills is not a man of great means. Some (him) might even go so far as to say that the expired egg truck driver (I’m assuming that’s what he does?) is POOR. SO POOR.

All Mills wanted to do for his 56th birthday was eat some free lobstah without killing anybody first (Don’t do it, Bobby! We hear that death row serves a terribly briny last meal platter!).

Oh that's not even FUNNY... too far, too far...

Fortunately for Rob and hitch hiking prostitutes everywhere, the Internet took up his case against Red Lobster. And guess what?

ROBSTER IS GETTING HIS LOBSTER!

While many of the web’s finest Tweeted and wrote on Red Lobster’s Facebook wall in support of the movement, the credit for this victory should fall square on the sexy shoulders of Matt Stopera from Buzzfeed, and then trickle on down to thewhitesade for tipping him off in the first place (so, not SUPER squarely I guess…)

Graphic by Skip

Merely 3 hours after Buzzfeed unleashed their army of loyal readers upon Red Lobster’s social media properties, the company replied with this:

And we, the Internet people FREAKED OUT with joy. Or maybe it was just me? I don’t know, but I’m chuffed that Red Lobster retweeted me:

GIVINK TO ME ALL JOUR BIZZKITS NOW!

Standing Crabwalk break:

Feb 21, 2012 | Source: Keek.com

Back to the story.

Robert Mills eventually logged onto The Facebooks again and I’m assuming he saw the melee because he made a statement:

A few of the cats at work were wondering if maybe, just maybe, this was all a setup. A truly brilliant marketing campaign produced by Buzzfeed for the lobstahkings. It was certainly effective… but I’d like to think it was organic and pure. Otherwise, I’d feel a bit had. Buzzfeed has a very, very special place in my heart and my bookmarks. As in I don’t even have it bookmarked because it’s automatically the first thing I look at every minute.

I LOVE YOU, Buzzfeed Tweeter. *creepy whisper* I love you…

Something about the Old Mill is inherently creepy in a beautiful way

That’s me. Come find me here at the Old Mill and we’ll hang out, okay?

PS: Gizmodo did some digging and it turns out that our boy Rob is actually a convicted felon. Oops! Hehe. Oh well. Victory, all the same