Posts tagged canada
Happy Canada d’eh!
Jul 1st
Ketchup chips and black squirrels. Celine Dion. Correcting people who refer to us as Americans while traveling abroad. French product packaging, CBC radio and colourful currency with goofy names. Ketchup chips, poutine, and ketchup chips.
Two good oceans and five great lakes. Learning about Bonhomme Carnaval in elementary school. Spring, summer, winter and fall (but mostly fall). Accessible health care. Relative wealth.
Watching the boys in my life play hockey while sipping on hot chocolate from little white cups at the arena. Fresh produce in the backyard every summer. Holding doors open for anybody and everybody because that’s just what we do here.
Having a distinct and inherently awesome sense of humour. Forgetting that gay marriages are “unusual” because you’re so damn used to them that they really aren’t anymore. Chillin’ with the boys. Being able to score a Tom Yum soup, a callaloo patty, some chana masala, a whole-wheat vegan samosa, epic roti, taboulleh salad, an oshinko roll (with extra wasabi) and pinkberry for desert – without leaving your neighbourhood. Being active enough not to get superfat from eating all of that at the same time.
Our adorably inaccurate, kitschy stereotypes.
I could go on for d’ehs (I really love this country), but it’s Canada Day and I’ve got places to be! I’m about to go ride my pet moose up to my friend doug’s igloo for a poutine party, eh?
NATCH! It’s phototime. I’m really feelin’ this stuff lately. Maybe I’ll be a paparazzi when I grow up. Ninja lenses, wire taps… oh, don’t get me started!
As for Queen Elizabeth II, well she’s celebrating Canada day on Parliament Hill looking sweeter than a maple-glazed timbit.
Please pardon the Harper…
Love,
Lauren Oh’Canadaaaaaah, our home and native laaaaand…
Queen Elizabeth Style Watch, Day 2
Jun 29th
Queen Elizabeth II is one seriously savvy senior, wouldn’t you say?
Homegirl Her Royal Highness is currently on day number two of a nine day Canadian tour, and she’s already dazzling the critics with her fashionable frocks and accessories.
At least, I assume she is.
Is there such thing as a monarchical wardrobe critic?
Whatever. The ever-so-elegant QE2 is in Halifornia right now, just doing her Queenly thing and looking flyer than a flock of foxes.
Is that b&w bow ensemble perfect or what? The hat, the dress, the coat – *muah*!
I’d dare to say she looks rather fierce, but a shoppie at Mendocino told me the other day that that word is SO 2009.
Duly noted.
Behold, Day one of her visit. A butter-yellow hat completes her rainy day ensemble (notice the matching cuffs and umbrella.)
I’ll be keeping an eye on what our (second) favourite celebrity octogenarian is wearing all week. I’m super excited to see what she sports when she comes to Toronto!
Which of her chic chapeaus will Queen Elizabeth II rock at the racetrack? A new one, perhaps… wait – is it un-queenly to wear the same thing twice?
ohhhh coolness be damned – This woman is FIERCE!
<3L
The awesome & hilarious digest – live from Montreal!
Jun 12th
Bonjour mes amis!
Je suis dans un petit cafe en Montreal, Quebec. Non, c’est un grande cafe. Tres grande est TRES belle. La service est bon, est mon cafe, oooh mon cafe… c’est magnifique. Ce la ma premier solo voyage en “French Canada”. Ma Français est pauvre… regardez vous?
If you speak fluent French, I’m sure that sounded just atrocious, non? The last time I had to actually use the language was in France and even then, it was mostly Franglish. I opted out of French class after grade 10 in favour of drama and computer science.
Consequentially, I’m able to lie my way out of sticky situations undetected with relative ease and code in a multitude of obsolete programming languages — but I can’t communicate in both of my country’s official languages without sounding like a total couch tard.
As you can see, my sense of humour hasn’t matured all that much since Grade 9 french class.
I remember getting a detention after my teacher asked a yawning student “Est tu Fatigue?” and I burst out laughing with “HAHAHA – FATTY-GAY! It sounds like you just asked him if he’s FAT AND GAY!”
My parents must have been so proud…
Anyways, here I am in Montreal – just for the day – working. My first legit business trip! I flew in this morning and I fly out tonight. I felt all grown up and profesh riding a plane with makeup on in my bizznass threads next to the fanny-pack toting tourist moms (*cough* Annetski!) and sleepy Lulu clad university clan that I used to be a part of…
Maybe next time, I’ll go all out and rock some Gaga style airline attire…
… or perhaps not.
Anyhoo, a few hours to kill = MAD BLOGGAGE TIME for this kid! I’m tempted to explore the city a little bit, but exploration usually (nay, ALWAYS) leads to shopping and my bank account has been hit hard enough by the city of Toronto this week (scroll down for more on that sitch).
Here’s my not-so-weekly digest of awesomeness and hilarity for June the 12th…
A whole lot of awesome going on these past couple of weeks – and a fair bit of hilarity too… if you consider multiple parking infractions and epic kitchen fails hilarious.
Normally I don’t, but since life can only be one of two things (awesome or hilarious) and said incidents don’t fall into the former category, they must be hilarious… right?
Serenity now… serenity now…
- AWESOME: Starting my new job and realizing that actually working in a newsroom is about a trillion times more fun than pretending to work in a newsroom at J-school – especially when you’re focused exclusively on city news in a bomb ass city like Toronto. No wars, no earthquakes, no foreign politics – just straight up, good ol’ pedestrian fatalities, jewelry store serial robberies and… black bear attacks?
Seriously though, I am absolutely loving my summer job at The Star. Here I am signing my contract -awww…
(photo credit: the fantabulous iPhone of Mr. Roger Gillespie)
- HILARIOUS: A scheduling snafu that messed up my entire week. I happened to jot down my work schedule completely wrong and then entered it into my Google calendar completely wrong and then scheduled my social life and other work around this completely wrong schedule and thennnnnn showed up at work Tuesday morning at 8:00 am like “HI! Oh… I don’t work? Oh, that’s right, I AM an idiot...”
- AWESOME: Getting to witness Ashley Tisdale shoot a scene from an upcoming High School musical spinoff about Sharpay or something…
Pink. Blonde. Disney. Loves it.
- HILARIOUS: Breaking my gracious host/best friend/ruler of all things good’s microwave. Sorry boys… you know I suck at kitchen. I should probably just eat out until I get my own place and place-related kitchen things to break.
- AWESOME: Hitting up my cousin’s wedding last weekend. What a lovely day! Gorgeous venue at the University of Waterloo (whoodathunk?), beautiful ceremony, rockin’ reception and such a sweet couple… they are seriously too precious for words. The love was just bouncing around that room the whole time. I don’t think there was a dry eye in the house when Britton and Stephanie said their vows…
(totally jacked that picture from my new cousin-in-law’s facebook, btw. Thanks Steph!)
I now have TWO married cousins – one on my mom’s side, one on my dad’s. Both are vegans, coincidentally – which rulllles for me as a vegematarian wedding guest. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve been forced to eat lettuce and potatoes at weddings while the other guests stare at me like an anorexic rabbit. The food at this wedding was, in the words of the honourable Ms. Rachel Ray, “YUM-O!” (and never had a face! huzzah!)
Five years ago, you couldn’t have PAID me to write the following sentence, but I actually had fun hanging out with my little brother on Saturday. Now that he’s stopped stealing the remote control from me and razzing my boyfriends on the telephone, he’s actuall ya pretty cool kid. Sheet… not even a kid anymore I guess. 21! Time… how she flies…
Here are a few photos of us with our dates (SDubz and Laura) on Satty.
Stop making that duckface…
w/ Frikshun…
The O’Nizzles… (um, we’d had some wine…)
- HILARIOUS : Having my car towed away 15 minutes before I was supposed to be at work yesterday. That was AWESOME (If I had purchased the sarcasm mark, I would have put it riiiight here.)
I’m not going to go into a detailed history of my car troubles in this city because I’ve blogged extensively about this issue in the past. I will simply note that I am a F*CKING IDIOT for failing to read the sign and getting myself towed again. Fool me once, shame on you – Fool me twice, shame on WU!
- AWESOME: Covering Strut For a Cure in Toronto.
Not only did I get to party with Toronto’s most fashionable, shake the hand of Miss Jeanne Beker and watch Dragonette perform live (so. fierce.), I got to meet and interview THE Coco Rocha. I know. I still can’t believe it myself.
Check out my interview with coco and blogpost about the event for vitaminwater canada if you so desire.
BANANAHAMMOCK: I don’t know if this is awesome or hilarious… perhaps both. Either way, it’s definitely blawgworthy. Behold, my old friend Mr. H. rolling his shorts up into sexy euro-trunks at the beach. Posing in a creep-lean when families with small children walked by made this all the more golden.
AWESOME: The premier of The Hard Times of RJ Berger was DEFINITELY awesome and hilarious. Some people accused it of being a bit crass , but I loved it nonetheless. It was clever, cute, and very very funny. TWO PIGTAILS AND A PONYTAIL UP!
C’est tout for now!
I’ve got to run off now to do what I’m here to do…
Au Revoir, baurevoirs…
Laurên EauNizzle
Tonight, death comes to town…
Jan 12th
It’s here, It’s here, IT’S FINALLY HERE!
The new eight part Kids in the Hall miniseries premiers tonight at 9:00 pm on CBC! Check out the trailer for Death Comes to Town. DO IT DO IT DO IT BECAUSE I’M TELLING YOU TO DO IT!
After what feels like about a KAJILLION years, Our legendary offbeat funnyboys are returning to dah tee-vee, bringing joy into the hearts of Canadian comedy afficianados everywhere.
And trust – we’re everywhere. In fact, Humour is one of our main exports up here in Canada.
Our comedians are as talented as our hockey players; as plentiful as our majestic geese; as sweet and delicious as our maple syrup; as delightfully obscure yet thoroughly satisfying as our poutine!
(note: the statement about geese being majestic was completely in jest. I detest those scary, sidewalk clogging green-poop machines.)
Did you know that Jim Carrey, Mike Meyers, Seth Rogen, Lorne Michaels, John Candy, Martin Short, Russell Peters, Caroline Rhea, Rick Mercer, Euguene Levy, Elvira Kurt, Phil Hartman, Will Arnett, Catherine O’hara, and Dan Aykroyd are ALL clever Canucks? Yup. If you’d like more information about real comedy, google “SCTV“. Now.
k, Imma stop before I break into a round of “Oh, Canada.”
I’m suddenly feeling quite patriotic…
Back to “Death“.
Insider reviews have been mixed. The Star is loving it up, while The Globe’s John Doyle is … acting the curmudgeon and blasting the series as “appallingly slow-witted TV, a mistake of major proportions” and “a dismal coda to the comedy troupe’s outstanding career.”
Ouch. Perhaps he’d favour something a little more age appropriate?
I keed, I keed 
Anyways, I for one am looking forward to the newest K.I.T.H. joint in a BIG BIG way. Hey – if it sucks, I can always flip over to the American Idol Auditions… I think it can go without saying that this is the only legitimate time to watch. People making fools of themselves in an attempt to get 15 seconds? Yes. Talented young Walmart-cashier turned pop-star hopefuls getting told they suck at life by a narcissistic man-boobied British deck?
Mmmmno thanks.
Though I am curious to see how my girl Ellen does as the new Paula.
I wonder who Fox will shuffle in next if the ratings of this tragically played-out show don’t magically skyrocket?
<3
