Socks with Sandals – Would You Rock it?
Jul 29th
to besock thy foot or not to besock thy foot… that is today’s sartorial conundrum.
What do you think, friend? Is the socks & sandals trend school girl cute or get the feck oot?
it’s a debate as old as time itself.
… okay maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration.
It’s actually a debate that’s as old as Fall of 2009ish within the fashion community (give or take a few seasons – I do live in Canada and suck at fashion, after all).
For me, it’s a debate as old as an 8th Grade field trip to Niagara falls when I stood my proud germaphobic ground and refused to take off daddy’s white tube socks – even after the other girls told me I looked like a dork.
Apparently, wearing knee-high mansocks with Nike slides, demin minishorts and an oversized Gap sweatshirt was not looked upon favourably by the 12-year-old fashionistas of Chatham. Little did those betches know, I was just being fashion forward.
Obviously, I’m all for this look. I’m a die-hard lifetime sock fanatic (I hate bare feet) and I’m all about the lolita chic aesthetic.
I’ve been experimenting with this trend a bit this year, pairing dainty nylons with pumps and mary-janes when appropriate – but I’ve yet to go all out and strap someopen-toed espadrilles over a pair of socks. yet.
I think I may just try it out this weekend… I’ve got the perfect pair of Michael Kors Nikis, I just need the right sockies to wear them with! I wonder if my mom kept these puppies?
SHORTBANGS FTW!
<3
Dorkus O’Lorkus.
i’m going on a diet.
Jul 28th
It’s true.
I can’t deny the fact that my lifestyle is simply unhealthy any longer. If I want to be the best Lauren I can be, I’ve got to make a change.
Sure, it’ll be hard to give up some of the things I love (or at least consume them at a more moderate level) but I know it’s for the best. I’ll have more energy, sleep better, and maybe I’ve even look a bit prettier too.
Certain parts of my body will thank me in spades, of course…
Most notably my wrists, thumbs, and retinas.
Bros, hoes and unacquainted joes – my name is BeeBerry McGee and I am a helplessly addicted digital glutton.
What, you didn’t think I was going to give up my frogurts and lollipops or something now did you? let’s not get CRAZY here. These chicken-legs don’t need to get any… chickenyer (shut up).
The diet I’m about to attempt is an “e-diet” – a digital detox, of sorts.
Not like, the legit annual digital detox week pimped by Adbusters (<3) since that’s already passed for this year (Though rumor has it there will be another one in September), but my own little modified detox.
Due to the nature of what I do to bring home the facon, going cold turkey is simply not an option for me at this point. I’d lose both of my jobs if I couldn’t use a computer and I’d lose both of my remaining marbles if I couldn’t use a smartphone.
What I CAN manage to do without tossing my career into the toilet, however, is take ONE day per week offline.
No laptop, no desktop, no BlackBerry, no iPad (I say this as if I actually HAVE one). Maybe I’ll even get REAL crazy and say ta-ta to the teevee too. It’s not like I ever actually sit down and watch it exclusively, anyways… but I do like to have it on in the background of my life. I actually get anxious when the TV isn’t on. It’s a comfort thing, I think. I never feel alone when I’ve got the familar voices of my extended family (Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, Hank, Peggy, Bobby, Rachel, Monica, Joey, Chandler, Elaine, George, Jerry, Stan, Kyle, Cartman… you know where I’m going with this) around me in stereo.
Now, I’ve seen enough episodes of Bulging Brides (don’t judge) to know that if you try to quit your bad habits cold turkey, you’ll backfire big time.
You can’t just go from eating pie-filled cakes and chocolate-covered cheese bricks to kale and arugula overnight without some seeerious backlash bingeing.)
Thus, I must wean myself slowly off the electro-crack that fuels my happy until I can go one full day per week without touching any of my email accounts.
Just the thought of that makes me more nervous than a long-tailed cat in a room full o’ rocking chairs!
Soooo why the heck am I doing this, you ask?
Maybe you didn’t even ask that - but I’m going to tell you anyways because this is myyyyy blog.
The other day, I read an article about “nature deficit disorder” in a ladies magazine I picked up from the mystery pile of random reading crap at my gum.
I have reason to believe, as I often come to do when reading articles of this nature, that I am suffering from said disorder.
And you are too, I bet.
And the children! All of the children…
Next Monday, it begins. Monday is a civic holiday in Canada, so it shouldn’t be too difficult to stop thinking about work.
If it’s nice out, I’m taking off into the forest with NO phone, NO computer, NO GPS (that doesn’t sound smart, does it?) and I’m getting back to my cavewomanly roots for half a day. (baby steps.)
I am HUMAN, hear me HUME!!!
Wow. Word to the wise – if you’re going to google “cavewoman”, expect a lot of rule 34.
Love,
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Jane Austen’s Fight Club & Crushing On a Cloud…
Jul 27th
20 minutes ago, I had no idea who Daniel ‘Cloud’ Campos was.
Then I saw this video of him dance-cleaning an apartment/being adorable and subsequently Googled the heck out of him.
Turns out, homeboy’s a 27-year-old L.A. based professional dancer, choreographer & film maker who tours with her Madgesty and tears it up with Shakira on a bed in her “Did it Again” video.
I’m totally in love with him after watching this and you probably will be too once you see it – Even if you’re not into guys. Even if you’re not into homosapiens (you sick flahck!).
He’s that effing cute. And cute turns into dreamy once you realize that he choreographed, styled, wrote, edited and SHOT this piece (somehow) all by himself.
*MEGASWOON*
I’m inspired to dust my coffee table by spinning on my head this week. Wish me luck!
In other blogworthiness, meet Jane Austen’s Fight Club:
(via mashable)
I wish this were an actual film – or better yet, real life. I’d be glove slapping my fellow gentry-women left and right centre if I were so lucky as to be invited into this pre-turn of the century aristocratic fight club…
*sigh*
A girl can dream. And also watch hilarious web videos.
God save the Net!
Love,
The Marchioness of Torontofordshire.
-L
Timas, Diplo, Monokini: the awesome & hilarious digest for july 25th 2010
Jul 26th
Me: *grumble grumble* Can I add “lame” to the awesomehilarious post today? Just this once?
You: “No you can’t, because the whole darn thing is about maintaining a positive attitude in the face of adverrrsity or something stupid and idealistic like that. Remember?”
*sigh* Frick.
Let’s start with “hilarious” then…
- Getting slapped with a $220 towing fee + a $60 ticket after my car mysteriously disappeared from the street. Apparently, I was partially obstructing some crochety old loosah’s driveway with the nose of my car. This would have been a “c’est la vie! live and learn! at least I still have legs!” moment had I not already been towed 3 times this year and running late for work.It’s not cute, it’s not funny, it’s not blonde - this stuff is expensive and it’s holding me back from doing better things with my hard-earned cash.I normally try not to refrain from using off-colour language on my blog, but my word am I angry! BEIGE Toronto’s lame parking rules, EGGSHELL the surly tow truck driver and TAUPE this overpopulated city’s lack of spaces to park.Adding insult to injury, when I got to work and tried to park in the lot that usually charges me $10, I was asked for THIRTY because there were “lot of special event in city today” – so I drove down the road and paid 20$ instead. *grumble grumble*
From this point on it’s mostly awesome. Outside of parking woes (and some surrious sleep deprivation) life’s been pretty gravy lately:
- Friday’s TIME Festival at Sound Academy. Y’all know I love me some dubstep, right? My week was already jam-booked but I could NOT pass up a chance to see Diplo spin in my backyard so I scored some last minute tix and danced my face off until 5a.m. I made a video, too… one of my buddies grabbed the camera at some point and shot me shaking my thang (thanks MP!). Please don’t mind the falling down shorts or the sweaty blonde mop on my head.
- The Toronto Independent Music Awards were earlier that night, and that was fantastic as well. Got a chance to chat with so many sweet local bands / rappers / singers / rockstars. Still processing videos from the event for work (when I’m not at other work), but I dooo have this picture of yours truly interviewing m’boy Sean Ward – TIMA host / blogger / comic artist / vlogger extraordinaire:
- This article on the top 5 web pranks ever pulled by moot and the 4chan gang = also awesome.
- I ordered my new laptop last night
Did I go Mac or PC? All will be revealed in due time my friend, but I WILL tell you this – my new baby has been custom engineered with an i7 processor, 6 Gigs of RAM and a whole TERABYTE of storage on the HD. She looks dammmmn good too - hilarious: I’ve come close to buying this dress three times now, but after seeing no less than 5 girls rocking it around the city have decided that I just can’t do it.
As much as I adore it (and I do – so, so, so much) I just can’t stomach shelling out for something that everyone else has. I’m not one for uniforms. Jeez, you’d think Douglas Coupland could have designed more than ONE dress for his roots collection.
- awesome: The Cotton Candy T monokini by Zeugari. Actually, EVERYTHING by Zuegari. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll see me rocking one of these masterpieces at WakeStock…
Yummy. - Signing a lease for my shiny sweet apartment – FINALLY! I’ve been living in Toronto now for over 2 months – I figured it was time to put my name on a piece of paper and unpack my bags for good. The big move with all the furniture coming out of my storage locker in London goes down at the end of August. I hate moving (ie; watching my male relatives and friends move my stuff up and down stairs), but it’ll be so nice to have my entire wardrobe up here with me. And like, my bed and computer desk and stuff.
- Annnd finally, I can’t get this song out of my head which is awesome because I’m in love with it at the moment. So sassy!Hate Hate, Hate Hate Hate…
All eyes on me, I took the night…
Boarding, Bands and Bikinis – Come with me to Wakestock!
Jul 25th
Come on – you deserve at least one (if not 12) ridiculous party weekend(s) this summer. It’s SUMMERTIME, you know?
My first Wakestock adventure was in 2008. It was on the island and, thanks to some tropical style rain/sun/rain/sun weather, it was a hot muddy mess. A hot muddy mess filled with hot muddy crowds of beer-drinking fun havers, bikini contests and free swag at every turn (I lived off of energy drinks, chocolate milk and gum that weekend. Did I mention that METRIC and RZA and DRAGONETTE performed along with like, 19 other sick bands – ’cause that’s definitely blogworthy.
The little great-lakes community I lived in before moving to the big city pretty much lives for the summertime. It’s no more than a 30 minute drive in almost any direction before you hit a big blue body of water, and lohdy knows do we take advantage of that!
(hahaha @ concentration face)
I was hanging around with a lot of wakeboarder kids during the summer of 2008, and not wanting to be mistaken for some token blonde boat candy I jumped at the chance to support my homies who were competing that year.
I wish I could say I stood there the whole time cheering them on as they tore it up against some of the best wake athletes in the world like a good friend (yeah, I said THE WORLD – this event is hugetime, dig?), but I got a wee bit distracted by all of the awesome going on around the island.
As much as I love to watch wakeboarding (and I do), skateboarding will win me over every time. Not to brag but I could probably kick Tony Hawk’s ass playing Pro Skater on my N64 before I was old enough to date – not that anybody would have dated my nerdy eh-ess-ess at the time…
ANYWAYS…
Wakestock =|= wakeboarding. Like, there’s a lot of wakeboarding (+ cute shirtless wakeboarder boys) going on, but there are so many other fabulous things going on during said superfest : concerts, parties, demonstrations, free shite, good peeps… all the things I was talking about before. “Boarding, Bands and Bikinis“, if you will.
Speaking of bands, PUBLIC ENEMY is going to be headlining this year. Are you effing kidding me? When I read that I actually said “OH MY GOD!” out loud. The chick in the stall next to me was probably like “wtf?” but I didn’t care. Whoever booked that, madddd kudos. Chuck D is someone I’ve looked up to for a long time.
I’m also pretty psyched for Alexisonfire (they’re dope live) and Hollerado – ’cause well… just watch this video:
Sooo to get to the point of this post, I’ll be hitting up Wakestock 2010 along with the lovely Miss Casie Stewart,Raymi the Minx, and Carly Anne as a Wakestock Party Girl!
(image courtesy of casiestewart.com)
We’ll be around doing our bloggity/party/bloggityparty thing and as one of my bffs YOU get to come with us on the cheap ( if you read my blog, I totally consider you one of my BFFs. Life’s more fun that way.)
Hurr’s the deal – get your discounted Wakestock tix by entering the promo code (PARTYGIRL) in the “Social Ticket Offer” part of the order form and BAM – 3 days of awesome for only fiddy-fie bones. Well worth the scrilla, imho… just think of how pimp your facebook album will be – how jealous those mean betches from highschool will be when they see you surrounded by sun-kissed hotties crowd surfing while Flava Flav does hilarious things on stage…
Just DO IT. I’ll even buy a beer if you tweet me your co-ordinates in Collingwood.
<3 Always,
Lau
wise words from the mustachioed man on my hipster rag…
Jul 23rd
HAY HAY HAY!
Last week I picked up a bunch of free magazines at The Drake. (And by ‘magazines’, I mean promotional rags, pamphlets, postcards, flyers, discarded cocktail napkins… anything remotely cool looking and/or colourful that fit into my purse. Yeah, I’m one of those people – and I’ve got four bulletin boards, a computer desk overflowing with bright wacky schtuff and a perpetually sextuple-booked “zawesome events!” Google calendar to show for it.)
One of said magzors had some really cool stuff in it - like this:
annnnnd THIS:
And also, the greatest horoscopes I’ve ever read ever. I know I exaggerate like, a katrillion times a minute, but I’m being serious. In all my human life years, I have never laughed my way from Capricorn to Sagittarius straight (sans-whipits).
Mine (Scorpio) was pretty much bang-on…
You have a beer gut you didn’t have to pay for and your hearing is permanently shot from blasting illegally downloaded Diplo remixes over shitty dive-bar sound systems. If blogs could give out medals, you’d have a Purple Heart. Go get ‘em, tiger.
k, maybe not BANG on, but it was hilarious so things are gravy.
And speaking of gravy, the icing on my meaty cake of hip-to-be-hip gold was ION’s interview with Ukranian-born moustache man musician Eugene Hu?tz, front guy of uber-acclaimed gypsy-punk band Gogol Bordello.
I’d heard the good buzzzz about this band, but never really got around to checking them out as I’m not one for weird music that sounds like crap. Gogol’s music SO does not sound like crap, by the way, I just kind of assumed that it would based on all of the other highly buzzzzed about stuff I blindly download.
Plus, one of my Czech friends has a SUPER hate on for gypsies, and that Steven King book ‘Thinner‘ paints them in a terrible light, and Snatch too… so I was sort of like “ew, gypsies”.
Then I learned that hating on gypsies is like TOTALLY RACIST.
Huh.
Anyways, I’m totally going to marry a gypsy punk-rocker if he will have my hand because holysmokes do I less than three my new homeboy-in-my-head for saying this:
“… fashion is basically one of the lower forms of art. I don’t detest fashion. It’s just that the importance is blown out of proportion. Most fashion has become institutionalized elitism. Personally, I don’t give a fuck about fashion. That’s not to say I don’t appreciate if somebody whips some combination out that I’ve never seen before. Fashion is great when it is spontaneous and upbeat, or from somebody whose aesthetic about fashion is very artistic and solid…”
and also, this…
“the idea of nostalgia is very much a part of the Western condition. It’s also been employed as a big business by capitalists milking people’s weaknesses—a form of mental laziness. People are chasing the wrong things. It seems people are either constantly aiming towards some goal that they think will finally free them, or they are taking comfort in things that have already happened. It’s this doomed way of thinking that the best time in their life has either already happened, or that it never will happen, y’know? So, I’m not really a fan of that. It’s not about arriving anywhere, or dwelling on all the places you’ve been. It’s about the cruising.”
*swoon*
Smart and [would be] sexy [without the creepstache].
And yes, by the way, I understand the irony of me loving those statements – the hypocrisy -as I am both a hardcore clotheswhore and a girl who relies heavily on nostalgia for much of the content she produces. I’m trying to change both of those things, bear with me. We all need a little bit of a kick sometimes.
I am just loving all of this found indie and hipster media strewn around Toronto’s cool bars and java joints. Screw Nylon and Vice - I can be irreverently hip without having to spend a dime. *smug hair toss*
Wait… can I still be hip if I don’t blow my paycheque on stuff that makes me look like I’m not trying to be hip?
Meh. It’s okay… I was never hip to begin with.
<3 Lauren`
PS – I also realize that by hipster-bashing I’m being as unoriginal and douchebaggy as the very scenesters I’m making fun of. The blogoverse has been jokesin‘ on those American Apparel kids since like, 2008 or something. Google “stupid hipsters” – trust.
*sigh* we’re so damn insecure, the whole lot of us, aren’t we?
Zef soooo fresh: Die Antwoord & Sleigh Bells in Toronto
Jul 21st
“When Ninja’s hypnotically vulgar pelvic thrusts collide with Vi$$er’s I’ll-cut-you grin and a techno beat so massive it can unite continents, cultures and every corner of those aforementioned “interwebs,” who needs more of an answer than that?” (fb)
Wat pomp, julle?
I just got home from one dope fooking show at the Phoenix.
Die Antwoord + Sleigh Bells = some seriously next level shit.
I’m not going to sit here and tell you all about how awesome Ninja and Yo-Landi Vi$$er are because I already did that back in like, February.
What I will say is that after seeing the notoriously zef South African rap-ravers LIVE, I’m even deeper in love than ever before.
I didn’t expect Yo-Landi to be so tiny (or sexy, the little minx!), and Ninja was surprisingly polite with his stage banter (“jou ma se poes, means ‘your mum’s private parts!’” hahaha) but wicked nonetheless.
Their energy was off the chains, I mean that. I don’t know which of the world’s chains I’m referring to, but I like that turn of phrase and it feels appropriate here.
Die Antwoord straight killed it.
Brooklyn’s Sleigh Bells, a “noise-pop duo” as described by wiki, were just as insane.
I’d heard of the band, but never actually heard the band until tonight – and am I ever glad I did because their sound is very, very, very much the type of sound I dig.
Chatting with rockstar Alexis Krauss after the show was also a trip because she is very, very, very much the type of fiercely talented woman I look up to.
I’m just psyched as pie that I actually got into this concert. Like the supergenius that I am, I waited until the show was sold out before decided to get a ticket.
Figuring that I could grab a pair from scalpers, I went anyways annnnd lo-and-behold – scalpers a plenty… charging 80-100 bones a ticket. Five times the actual price!
“Come onnnn,” one grey-bearded old scalper dude yelled after I laughed in his face and started walking away. “You spend more than that on lipstick in a week!”
I was thisclose to kicking him in the balzzors, but I walked away and opened up UberTwitter on my BB instead.
A search for “die antwoord” revealed many an exciting tweet – one of which was particularly exciting to me:
@inspirationdate: Anyone need a Sleigh Bells + Die Antwoord ticket at cost? $20. I’ll be at the Phoenix in an hour or so.
SCORE!
Luck of the Irish + Magic of social media = me inside the venue 30 minutes later flanked by cute boys & sweet girls, drink in hand, smile on face.
In concloooojeeyon – I am once again grateful to the universe for an excellent night.
The bands were sick, the weather was hot, I got the chance to catch up with some of my good peeps and I met some new ones too.
Toronto shows are so very different from Detroit shows… it’s a much tighter scene. A little bit more pretentious, but a lot more Canadian. I love it
Can’t wait for the next one !
L.
PB&J Friendship Jewelry: Would you rock it?
Jul 20th
Morning, bebes!
Hands up if you love peanut butter!!!
I mean it. Put your freaking hands up as if somebody can actually see you right now. Let your love be KNOWN, my homie – even if only to your goldfish or that spider who’s watching you from the crack between your window and your wall (you can’t see him because he’s stealth like that, but trust me – he’s there.)
Now, hands up if you love cute.
You don’t even need to raise your hands for that one, actually. I already know who loves cute and who doesn’t. If you’re not one of these betches, you love cute. And if you are a Disney villainess well WHAT IS UP GIRL? I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’RE READING MY BLOG!!! Does this make me a cartoon celeb by proxy or something? eeeee!
uh… weird story short, peanut butter and jelly friendship rings are as adorable as peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are delicious.
Not a ring fan? Mebbbe you’d prefer a necklace…
Or bobby pins!
Too much cyoooote!
So, would you rock it? ‘Cause you know I would.
I’ve already got a jelly for my PB ring, but I’m still looking for the Thymine to my Adenine
Now please enjoy a low quality live recording of Sharon, Lois and Bram singing the “peanutttt, peanut butter – JELLY!” song, and a weird video of some dudes covered in delicious goo.:
Love,
Adenine O’Peanut Butter
How to trick people into thinking you’re good looking
Jul 19th
Dear Jenna Mourey,
I love you. Like, I love you – in the creepiest, most fan-girl obsessity way possible. This video rocked my Dollarama hallowe’en socks:
Never change.
Love,
Lauren O’Nizzle – a girl who sometimes tries to trick people into thinking she’s kind of good looking
sick soundtrack for facebook flick (+ timbfro hottness)
Jul 17th
Have y’all seen the trailer for David Fincher’s the social network yet?
you probably should, if only to moon over Justin Timberlake’s sweet little anglofro (i’d call it a jewfro or an afro, but timbo is neither jewish or african so… yeah) or any one of the ridiculously good-looking people that are about flash across your screen.
Like a hottie buffet for your brain, this one. Unbuckle the belt on your retinas right now, ladies and gents – the feast begins… (who the eff wears a belt inside their eyeball, btw? *judging you*)
As visually stimulating as this clip was, what really got me to watch it past the initial eye-rolling “oh PUH-LEASE – a freakin’ FACBEOOK MOVIE?” moment was the siccckly eerie choral cover of Radiohead’s “Creep” playing throughout.
I tend to be a visually inclined person by nature, but I do appreciate some good aural stimulation (*physically kicks mind up out of the gutter*)
Naturally, I Googled the shite out of said song and learned that this particular cover of Radiohead’s 1993 hit was done by Scala and Kolacny Brothers – an obscure Belgian girl’s choir headed up by two guys called Stijn and Steven Kolacny. It was recorded in 2002.
Nice choice, musical director (or whoever was responsible for selecting the viddy’s tuneage). The song itself is a noted favourite for many within the film’s target audience (which I can only assume is Millennials, GenX-ers, and the odd hip Boomer or curious teenybopper, judging by the content and promotional strategy thus far). It’s enduring – timely both now and, obviously, in 1993 where the film takes its roots.
I was only 7 when Radiohead dropped that track, but it’s one of my all-time favourite songs. I grew up listening to it, not really even understanding a lot of the subtleties until I was a lot older… kind of like those old episodes of the Simpsons and Seinfeld that I watched repeatedly as a child but didn’t really “get” until I was a teenager. (“Mommy, what’s a shrinkage?”)
Annnnd I’m babbling now, so I’ll go get on with my day. My parents are coming to visit in a few hours! They’re taking me to see Miss Saigon and then out for dinner. Hopefully, they’re bringing me some stuff from home… like Oatmeal the bear. I’m having trouble sleeping without him…
I totally just ripped that pic straight out of 2006. My dead myspace page is like a time capsule from 2nd year undergrad. Adorable and mortifying at the same time.
I wonder if Facebook will ever become extinct? Replaced by some new service and relegated into the dark abyss of interwebs past… used as a hosting service for indie bands and FOX show advertisements?
Nah… it’s TBTF… Like the Lehman Brothers or Merrill Lynch!
Wait, what?….
Whatever – it’s not like Myspace Tom ever had a film made about HIS life now is it? A film that has both ANN PERKINS and LONDON TIPTON in it, to boot!
I’m not even being snarky – I effing love Rashida Jones – so hard. And Brenda Song is cool too, even if I only know her as the Asian Paris Hilton of my Saturday morning TV line-up.
I don’t want to wait until October to see this flick. But I will, because I’m nice like that… and also, not magic.
<3 Lauren O’Yorke
